We’re taking time this week to reflect and to enjoy some down time. We’re also posing daily questions which prod reflection or action.
Today’s question is: What activity will you enjoy with your caree?
It can seem like all you and your caree often play a game of cat and mouse. Today, though, enjoy a game that allows you both to enjoy, to relax, to be beyond the disease the disease or injury that dealt you a bad hand. Your activity may only last a few minutes. That’s okay. Whatever you can manage will be great.
Play a game. Then, tell us about it in our comments section.
When you share in our comments section, you’ll be entered into a chance to win a great gift basket. Congratulations to Karen who won yesterday’s gift basket! And, be sure to check out our We Break for Summer! merchandise in our store; celebrate with a t-shirt or mug designed by our own Donna Webb. Shop here.
Tags: we break!
This month has flown by, I must say. My hand is healing, but the scar hurts a lot and I still can’t lift any weight with it. I suppose it all takes time. I’m driving again, but turning the ignition key, putting in reverse, and pulling up the handbrake hurt a lot. The rest not so much, unless I have to turn the wheel a lot. Thanks for all those who sent prayers my way!
Thanks for the comments on my posts. I always try not to be too dark because I have a slightly dark humour. Once I read up on humour and dark humour is a way of dealing with life’s adversities. There is a saying in Portuguese, “Rir para não chorar” – Laugh so you won’t cry. And what is it that Proverbs says, “Laughter is the best medicine”? And there is that laughter therapy where you sit in groups and guffaw. Very strange, but still, if it helps, I’m for it. Speaking of humour, I’m trying to watch funny stuff on Youtube, just for laughs. I watched Absolutely Fabulously episodes and Eddie’s ‘sweetie, darling’ lines always make me chuckle. And I watch a Brazilian comedy show too called Casseta & Planeta. They have a sketch which reveals where Bin Laden is, in Rio, in one of the favelas, married to an indignant wife who is always thumping him over the head with a rolling pin. “Stop that silly terrorist stuff.” Thump.
Several months ago, I was looked at a very tall To Do list that had to be completed within a very short time period. I was going over my list with a few colleagues, who I had asked to help me make sure I had a plan in place to complete what needed to be done. And, for me, my To Do list needed to be completed.
After walking through my list and my goals, my well-meaning colleagues said: When are you taking care of yourself? You must take care of yourself.
Which led to this thought of mine: Oh, for heaven’s sake! Getting through this To Do, in the amount of time I have, is how I take care care of myself!
It was an incredibly frustrating moment. A moment when I thought: Your suggestion only serves to increase my increasing frustration!
In a caregiving situation, your family and friends may see you on a bad day or in a bad way or in a bad mood. And, then, during your vulnerable time, they’ll share a suggestion, offer advice, state a solution. Which, of course, sends your bad to much worse worst.
So, today, in Tell Us, I wonder: What advice do you hear that you causes you to think: “You’re kidding, right? Because that’s just stupid.”
I look forward to reading your comments.
Tags: bad days, conflict, frustration
Image by utopiaaquatic via Flickr
We’re taking time this week to reflect and to enjoy some down time. We’re also posing daily questions which prod reflection or action.
Today’s question is: What needs your attention (your water, so to speak)?
Caregiving will make you wish for a clone. Without the help of a clone, something or someone slips from your radar. Today, water what needs your attention: A relationship, a goal, a dream. Perhaps your soul needs some watering. Today, make time for what or who needs your attention.
Water. Then, tell us about it in our comments section.
When you share in our comments section, you’ll be entered into a chance to win a great gift basket. Congratulations to Francine who won yesterday’s gift basket! And, be sure to check out our We Break for Summer! merchandise in our store; celebrate with a t-shirt or mug designed by our own Donna Webb. Shop here.
Tags: we break!
Today, we aired our second part of our two-part book club discussion. Today, Whitney Sheppard joined me to discuss her essay, “Do You Have Any Brothers or Sisters?,” which appears in our July book club pick, “Voices of Caregiving, The Healing Companion, Stories for Courage, Comfort and Strength.” You can listen to our discussion via the player, below.
In her essay and on our show, Whitney shared her struggle to find the words to describe her brother, Matthew, and her caregiving relationship to him. Our interview ended with some great words of advice from Whitney. Her words came as she heeded others to speak honestly about the feelings that accompany caregiving with an empathetic support system.
“Don’t believe the lie you tell yourself that you are alone,” she said. “You’re not.”
Related Articles
- Three Voices of Caregiving (caregiving.com)
- Break With Us on Your Journey (caregiving.com)
Tags: caregiving book club
I only have 2 more stops to get my note in here so it will be VERY quick – especially for me 
Things are dire in my household. Mom is squarely on hospice, as is my dad. Mom just woke up from a 5 day encephalopathic coma; we decided to treat at home this time BECAUSE she is on hospice. I’m on my way home from work – I’ve not actually seen her yet. She is talking, walking and eating, so that would be an improvement.
My nephew went home on Sunday – his dad came to pick him up. Unfortunately Mom was not awake, so they didn’t get to do their goodbye. This is probably good from a crying standpoint because she always gets him upset. But, he was upset because it could very well have been the last time they saw each other, and she was not awake.
Hospice has told me (and sent the Chaplain out) that now is the time to say things that need to be said and do things that need to be done. I’ve been advised to capitalize on the good days – if there are any more left with Mom. They have said she may have days, weeks, or if we’re lucky, months.
I am certainly NOT prepared for my Mom to go, let alone before my Dad. I mean, we’ve been planning this for Dad for a long time – preparing ourselves, etc. We did get the official letter from the transplant institute that she is no longer a candidate. They were even nice enough to provide names and numbers of other transplant programs in case we are interested. I wonder what the take rate is for that…nevertheless, they didn’t have to do that so, I guess I’ll give them credit.
We are have a difficult time adjusting from fighting to accepting that the fight is over and it is time to maximize life; VERY difficult. I have been in this fight personally and with self-sacrifice for 7 years now…Mom has been fighting since 1992 – 18 YEARS. Most of the time she is asleep and weak and hasn’t really given much thought to giving up the fight, I would imagine.
We’re taking time this week to reflect and to enjoy some down time. We’re also posing daily questions which prod reflection or action.
Today’s question is: What will you dive in and try?
Today, if you are new to our site, I hope you will dive in to our discussions (we’d love to meet you!).
Today, it’s about taking a chance, about diving into discomfort. Talk openly with your support system about a struggle. Find an activity that sounds fun and head out to enjoy it—by yourself. Set a boundary with a family member who oversteps their bounds. Delegate responsibility. Tell someone you love them.
Dive. Then, tell us about it in our comments section.
When you share in our comments section, you’ll be entered into a chance to win a great gift basket. Congratulations to G-J who won yesterday’s gift basket! And, be sure to check out our We Break for Summer! merchandise in our store; celebrate with a t-shirt or mug designed by our own Donna Webb. Shop here.
Tags: we break!
Today, on Your Caregiving Journey, we held our monthly book club discussion. In July, we read “Voices of Caregiving, the Healing Companion: Stories for Courage, Comfort and Strength.” Today, contributors Nancy Hoke, M.C. Winters and Marc Silver talked about their caregiving experiences. You can listen to our hour-long show via the player at the bottom of the post.
Each told a different story of caregiving; Nancy for her mother-in-law, M.C. for her grandfather; Marc for his wife. Each has graduated from caregiving (“Godspeed Caregivers”), enabling them to share a perspective which I hope you will find helpful. Although each voice sounds different, each voiced a hope that their story makes your experience easier.
I look forward to your comments about the show. What hit home for you?
Program Note: A fourth contributor to “Voices of Caregiving,” Whitney Sheppard, will join us tomorrow on Your Caregiving Journey at 1:30 p.m. CT to share her story. You can listen live here.
Related Articles
- Carving Out a Dream During Caregiving (caregiving.com)
- Tell Us: Do You Try to Play God? (caregiving.com)
- Book Review: The Daughter Trap (caregiving.com)
Tags: caregiving book club, forgiveness, guilt, happiness, Help, self-care
Photo Credit: Todtanis, Wiki Commons
We’re taking time this week to reflect and to enjoy some down time. We’re also posing daily questions which prod reflection or action.
Today’s question is: How will you jump into a new or better or different way?
Thinking you should try a new service? Find a better way? Choose a different perspective? Today’s the day to do it! Jump in, get your feet wet, swim a few laps. Test the waters. You always can get out if the water is too hot or cold.
Jump. Then, tell us about it in our comments section. When you share in our comments section, you’ll be entered into a chance to win a great gift basket.
Congratulations to Donna Webb who won yesterday’s gift basket!
Program Notes:
- Our book club discussion airs today on Your Caregiving Journey at 1 p.m. CT. In July, we’re reading “Voices of Caregiving, the Healing Companion: Stories for Courage, Comfort and Strength.” Four of the book’s contributors will join us for a discussion today and tomorrow. Today, contributors Nancy Hoke, M.C. Winters and Marc Silver will share their caregiving stories. Listen live (and download the podcast to enjoy later) here.
- Our free webinar, “Breaking the Daily Grind,” takes place tomorrow at 11 a.m. CT. Learn more and register here.
Tags: we break!
In this week’s poll, sponsored by Caregiving.com and eCareDiary.com, we wonder: How strong is your support system?
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