Several years ago, I wrote a series of articles about happiness: Can you be happy while you are in caregiving role? In the role, the losses can seem so intense and unending. Can you get a break from the losses long enough to feel happy? The answers from family caregivers were mixed: Some felt happy they could step in care, others felt so trapped and overwhelmed that happiness became elusive.
Happiness has become a hot topic, especially as we struggle with an economy in a down fall and a world that seems always ready for war. Can anyone be happy?
Last month, Chicago Tribune reported that 14% of Americans are not happy. That’s the highest mark since 1972 (I think long gas lines made people really unhappy). Americans’ unhappiness level has been growing since 2000. And, proof comes from the shelves in our bookstores: In 2008, 4,000 books were published on happiness. In 2000? Just 50.
Has life become so complicated that happiness, which is often based on simplicity, becomes covered? Are we struggling with so many problems and issues that happiness follows behind us, rather than accompanies us?
Or, do we just expect too much from Happiness?
Psychology Today published an article (The Pursuit of Happiness by Carlin Flora) about happiness in its January/February 2009 issue; some insights about happiness:
What do you think? Has happiness ebbed for you? If so, do you believe it’s related to taking on a caregiving role? Do you enjoy moments of happiness? If so, when? We’d love to hear from you. And, be sure to vote about your happiness in our poll (on your right).
I think happiness is temporary and sometimes elusive. This is because people’s perceptions of happiness is often based on circumstances going their way all the time or on material possessions. Joy and peace which are more lasting is what we all desire in the deepness of our spirits. A measure of joy and peace can be there even in difficult times. That does not rule out the sadness and frustration one might feel at such times, but the joy is still there underneath it all. I find this measure of joy and peace in my faith and relationship with God.
As I’ve gotten older, there has been more unhappiness in my life — and I am overall a very positive, upbeat person. The unhappiness is not a result of just becoming a caregiver, it comes from dealing with all the harder stuff life throws at one — health issues, financial issues, unexpected crisis, etc.
I do believe having bad times make the sweet times that much better. And it is simple things that often make me the most happy — not “things,” but time spent with loved ones and friends, or doing an activity I enjoy. I make sure I find some happiness for myself every day b/c life’s short and we don’t know what tomorrow may bring.
Caregiving definitely brings moments of happiness. When you can share quality time (however you define that), smiles, laughs, hugs and kisses with the people you love, how can you not be happy?!
Are you familiar with Gretchen Rubin’s Happiness Project, Denise? I’ve enjoyed reading her blog. Here’s the link for it:
http://www.happinessproject.typepad.com/
Have a great (happy) week!
I just checked out Gretchen’s blog–it’s terrific. Thanks for sharing–I’ll bookmark her.
So glad you did check out gretchens blog and decided to start a happiness challenge for all of us…thank you, thank you, thank you….
replace and join have become very special words to me. I so look forward to the next one…..