It didn’t take long to complete, although it may have taken awhile to convince your care recipient of its necessity. But, today, that simple piece of paper is worth a million bucks (or close to it).
Robert Freedman can’t emphasize enough the importance of a durable power of attorney for finances and for health care. “It’s not expensive to get,” he says, “and it’s the first line of defense against another family member.” Robert is a partner in the law firm of Mulder & Freedman, P.C. in Houston, Tex. The firm limits it practice to Medicaid, Estate and LateLife(c) planning and related matters.
You hope your brother won’t try to abscond with your mother’s money. But his drug problem makes his behavior erratic. Or, perhaps your sister’s divorce has taken its toll–and now she seems so desperate for money you wonder how far she’ll go.
With you as power of attorney, you can protect your mother’s finances and your right to responsibly manage those finances. And, part of responsible management of the money is responsible documentation of the money. Robert suggests keeping records, as thorough and complete as possible. In some states, such as Texas, documentation from the power of attorney managing the money is required. “Your records should account for income and funds paid out,” Robert explains. “You want to maintain a complete accounting of all the records.
“It can be difficult to do,” he agrees, “but if you don’t, then you run the risk of greater difficulty.”
Record keeping is also a good idea in order to prove that you are providing proper care. Robert suggests recording everything: Times and days when care is provided, the type of care provided, the assessment and opinion of the care recipient’s physician. (We recommend that family caregivers keep two diaries of their caregiving experiences: One to record the health of and care provided to the care recipient; the other, to journal the personal experiences of the family caregiver.)
Robert suggests that families consult with an attorney whenever legal documents, such as a power of attorney, are needed. But in situations when it seems that your family acts much more like foe than friend, a good attorney can be a godsend. The attorney can ensure the legal documents that protect the care recipient and family caregiver are in order and can mediate when family members’ hot tempers make discussions almost impossible.
And, if your care recipient sees other family members with rose-colored glasses (“Jimmy doesn’t drink that much…He just likes his beer.”), a good attorney can provide an objective insight that’s often needed. Robert often tells his clients: “Choosing a power attorney is not about who you love best. It’s about who is best able to manage the responsibility.” This message is much easier to hear from an attorney rather than from you. And, that’s worth every billable hour.
Mr. Freedman is a member in good standing of the National Association of Elder Law Attorneys (NAELA) and is head of the legal research curriculum at the Center for Advance Legal Studies, a paralegal institute in Houston, Tex.
To find an attorney who specializes in elder law issues, contact:
National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys, Inc.
1604 North Country Club Road
Tucson, Arizona 85716
520-881-4005
www.naela.com
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This post is dead-on. It’s sad to think of a family member taking advantage of a disabled parent or sibling. But I’ve seen it happen. And, from my experience, the pain and inconvenience of ensuring the safety of a loved one’s finances is so much better than having to figure out what to do once the cat is already out of the bag.