Comments on: We’re Reluctant, But They’re Willing http://www.caregiving.com/2009/07/were-reluctant-but-theyre-willing/ Insights ~ Information ~ Inspirations Fri, 10 Feb 2012 05:57:31 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Kaye Swain http://www.caregiving.com/2009/07/were-reluctant-but-theyre-willing/comment-page-1/#comment-148892 Kaye Swain Mon, 08 Aug 2011 04:00:18 +0000 http://www.caregiving.com/?p=2511#comment-148892 Terrific article, Denise. Thank you. I so agree with the statement Greg Gordon made above, that the conversation needs to start BEFORE the need begins. The hard part is that driving is such a vital part of our lives, and stopping driving often seems to affect us more emotionally than preparing wills and living trusts - at least in my family. Subconsciously, we often start thinking of all the negatives - including "I am too old," "I am too sick," "I am having to think of my own mortality and it scares me," "I am powerless," and so on. And for those who don't have family living nearby, the more pragmatic, "How can I get to the doctor, the store, the post office!" I really appreciated the tips Liberty Mutual offers and think they have some wise ideas. To them, I would suggest, start sooner. Start well before there is any problem or need and discuss with them what should we be looking for, what should we plan for you when the time comes. This is especially vital after any major diagnosis or illness, such as Parkinsons Disease, Alzheimers Disease, or after having a stroke. That really helped with my senior dad in other matters and I wish we'd discussed driving sooner as well. In my case, it all worked out ok, but we did have some tense moments over it. And perhaps that would have happened no matter what because, as I said before, it's such an emotionally charged issue. Thanks again for such a useful and thought-provoking article! Terrific article, Denise. Thank you. I so agree with the statement Greg Gordon made above, that the conversation needs to start BEFORE the need begins. The hard part is that driving is such a vital part of our lives, and stopping driving often seems to affect us more emotionally than preparing wills and living trusts – at least in my family. Subconsciously, we often start thinking of all the negatives – including “I am too old,” “I am too sick,” “I am having to think of my own mortality and it scares me,” “I am powerless,” and so on. And for those who don’t have family living nearby, the more pragmatic, “How can I get to the doctor, the store, the post office!”

I really appreciated the tips Liberty Mutual offers and think they have some wise ideas. To them, I would suggest, start sooner. Start well before there is any problem or need and discuss with them what should we be looking for, what should we plan for you when the time comes. This is especially vital after any major diagnosis or illness, such as Parkinsons Disease, Alzheimers Disease, or after having a stroke. That really helped with my senior dad in other matters and I wish we’d discussed driving sooner as well.

In my case, it all worked out ok, but we did have some tense moments over it. And perhaps that would have happened no matter what because, as I said before, it’s such an emotionally charged issue.

Thanks again for such a useful and thought-provoking article!

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