It doesn’t have to be this way

Since I last blogged, I have had quite a tough and depressing time. My aunt sent me an eviction notice on my birthday and the week after I got mom into her temporary detox unit. I learned not only is my aunt evicting me, but all occupants. That includes mom who was supposed to come home after three months of detox. Mom and my aunt co-own this house. I was only given 30 days to vacate. I am fighting for more time....

September Summer Send-Off: You Can Win!

In honor of summer’s end, we’re giving away four $25 Visa gift cards each week for four weeks in September—that’s $400 in give-aways. Our give-away begins Tuesday, September 2, and ends Friday, September 25. You can win by participating on Twitter, Facebook and our website, as well as by listening to Your Caregiving Journey. We’ll announce the four winners of the four $25 gift cards each Saturday...

What If… Decisions Near Life’s End

(Editor’s Note: Over the past few days, we’ve been sharing articles to help you with difficult decisions. The Hospice Institute of the Florida Suncoast shared the following article, courtesy of Caregiving at Life’s End: The National Train the Trainer Program, to help you make end-of-life decisions.) Throughout the experience of caregiving you may be faced with making decisions with and for your care...

A Physician’s Perspective: The Feeding Tube Decision

It’s the question you may dread the most: The doctor has indicated that your care recipient will continue to lose weight and suggests a feeding tube. Should you say “yes”? We asked Dr. Terrie Ginsberg who specializes in Geriatrics at the University of Medicine and Dentistry, New Jersey School of Osteopathic Medicine, Center for Aging, Stratford, N.J., for her ...

A Reprieve

It has again been a couple weeks since I posted a blog. My husband, Wayne, continues to do his physical therapy every Wed. He is definitely gaining in brute strength. Last night he was able to get out of an easy chair at our son’s house basically unaided by hanging on to his wheel chair. My son has always helped him get out of this chair in the past. So that was an exciting achievement. (At home he has a...

The Ethics of Caregiving: Navigating The Shades Of Grey

Ethics: A set of principles of right conduct. A theory or a system of moral values: “An ethic of service is at war with a craving for gain” (Gregg Easterbrook). The study of the general nature of morals and of the specific moral choices to be made by a person; moral philosophy. The rules or standards governing the conduct of a person or the members of a profession. Your spouse has advanced Alzheimer’s...

End-of-Life Care: Working Within the Laws of Nature

This is hard to hear, but important to know: When caring for an aging relative, you are helping a family member die well. The process of helping someone to die well begins early on in your caregiving journey. It begins when you first hear a diagnosis. Or, when you first notice that your mother just isn’t able to keep up the house as well as she used to. Or, when you celebrate your grandmother’s 95th...

This Week, Write about Your Perspective

Image by incurable_hippie via Flickr (Editor’s Note: On Wednesdays, we share a journaling tip as part of our series, Journaling 101. This is tip No. 19.) It’s hard not to see everything with a negative perspective because so many negative things have happened. Surrounded by so much negativity, it can seem that you’re just doing everything wrong. You’re not. You’re doing your best,...

Tips for Managing an Aging Relative’s Move from a Distance

Sheri Samotin of LifeBridge Solutions joined us today on Your Caregiving Journey for discussion of managing a move from miles away. You can listen to our show via the player below. (If you have your speakers on, you’ll hear the show start automatically.) During the show, Sheri referenced some helpful organizations, which I’ve listed below: National Association of Senior Move Managers National Association of...

Grow

A family caregiver, Donna, once told me that she only developed her green thumb after her caregiving journey began. Before caregiving, Donna’s plants were brown and lifeless. During caregiving, her plants bloomed. What have you grown since caregiving began for you? Think: –How have your skills and talents grown? –How have your relationships grown? –How has your wisdom grown? You are...

Ask Denise: What Can I Do for Mom with Advanced Dementia?

Hi Denise, First, I want to thank you for offering your help and for all the help you’ve been giving.  Bless You! Here’s my situation:  My mom has dementia of the frontal lobe.  Her first diagnose was verbal aphasia.  It’s years later, my Mom is in a care facility on the dementia floor.  She hasn’t spoken in years.  At this point, it’s hard to tell if she understands anything. ...

Keeping Track of Health Reform

We’ve gathered a few resources so you can stay abreast of health reform; we’ll add more as we find them: Trudy Lieberman has started a blog, Straight Talk, about health reform debate on the Columbia Journalism Review website.  Trudy directs the health and medical reporting program in the graduate school of journalism at City University of New York. Kaiser Health News has created A Consumer’s...

Take Caregiving.com’s Staycation Challenge

It’s one more thing to give up because of caregiving: A vacation. Just because you stay home, though, doesn’t mean you can’t still have some of the fun you’ve reserved to enjoy during that week away. From now until August 30, take a staycation, even if it only lasts for five minutes. Think you can’t? We’ve got some ideas to help you know you can: –buy a lounge chair and sit in your backyard in...

Survey Highlights Needs of Unpaid Caregivers of Persons with Diabetes

Diet and exercise plans, managing blood sugar levels and reliable online information cited as top concerns The Hormone Foundation, the public education affiliate of The Endocrine Society, in collaboration with the National Alliance for Caregiving, today released key findings from a first-of-its-kind survey aimed at better understanding the daily needs and struggles of unpaid caregivers of people with diabetes. The...

Ask Denise: How I Can Stay Home to Care for My Parents?

Dear Denise, I need help. I live in California and was laid off in October. I have been on unemployment and looking for a job. More and more, I have become the caregiver for both my elderly parents. I have looked into the state funded caregiver program but on paper my parents make too much money to qualify. In reality, they are barely making ends meet. MY unemployment is due to run out and I know I can not go back...

This Week, Consider What You’ve Gained

Image by paperbackwriter via Flickr (Editor’s Note: On Wednesdays, we share a journaling tip as part of our series, Journaling 101. This is tip No. 18.) In a caregiving situation, it’s hard not to think about all that you’ve lost, particularly because the losses are so much in your face (you’ve “lost” time, relationships, money and your care recipient seems to have lost...

President Obama and Faith Leaders Discuss Health Reform

On Wednesday, August 19, at 5 p.m. ET, President Barak Obama joined faith leaders from across the country in a discussion about health reform. 40 Minutes for Health Reform hosted the show on BlogTalkRadio. A round-table talk took place during the first 30 minutes; President Obama participated during the last 10 minutes. You can listen to the show on the player,...

Dip

Do you need a refreshing dip in the pool this week? A dip in the pool refreshes, energizes, renews. A dip in the pool clears your head, presents a new solution, shows you the way. No pool? Take a dip by taking a nap when you need it, slowing down to catch your breath or enjoying quiet time with a refreshing glass of lemonade. This week, take a...

Ask Denise: How Do I Deal with the Endless Demands?

On Thursday, I gave an eldercare presentation to a group of employees at a large corporation based here in Chicago. At the end of the presentation, an attendee asked: “What do I do about my mom? She insists on going to the doctor. A few years ago, she was seeing 24 doctors who all prescribed medications. I stopped that. She now lives in a retirement community so I know she has access to transportation, help...

Update on My Caregiving Experience

It has been about a month and a half since I posted at cargiving.com. It has been a busy summer since then. As I think I wrote in my last post my husband, Wayne, started doing some physical therapy. It is actually with a physical trainer. We have seen some real gains in brute physical strength. Wayne’s upper body strength was fairly good yet even before we started this, but I want to make sure we maintained...

Ahhh…. ARGH! From Blueberry Waffles to a Physician’s Nonsense

I sat down to the breakfast table this morning with two waffles topped with butter, blueberries and syrup. The cranberry juice was straight-out-of-the-fridge cold. Ahhh… Life is good. I opened the front section of the Chicago Tribune, perusing page-by-page until I arrived to the Letters to the Editor section. Hmm… The debate over end-of-life discussions has hit the Opinion page. The catalyst was an...

Tell Us: What’s Your Thanks-to-Caregiving Vice?

Image by MadMan the Mighty via Flickr You hear it often enough. Take care of yourself. And, it is critical that you take care of yourself. You are a precious commodity, not only now, during your caregiving experience, but later, when caregiving ends. The world needs you–today and tomorrow. But, let’s face it. Caregiving is stressful. And, in stressful times it seems so much easier to pick up that...