This picture was taken in December of 1966, in Big Trees National Park, CA. I was 8 years old, my brother was 14 and my sister 10. The pretty lady holding the leash to our dog Red is my beautiful Mother Virginia. In this picture my mom was 40 years old, younger than I am now.
Today my mom celebrated her 83rd birthday. My mom has suffered several strokes so she is partially paralyzed on her right side, but she is still able to do most things for herself. My mom is beautiful, smart and funny. My mom loves to read and she loves to watch old movies, cooking shows and game shows on television.
Prior to my dad’s death in July of 2003, my mom was very ill, most of that attributed to my dad’s ill health, he had Parkinson’s disease and drug induced dementia/sundowners. My dad kept us busy taking care of him, his ill health, mostly the dementia caused a lot of stress on my mom, since he depended on her for so much, and in reality, she was not able to care for him. After my dad’s death my mom’s health improved and for the last 6 years she has been basically healthy. She doesn’t care to get out of the house, and mostly just goes out for dr. appts and occasionally to go take flowers to the cemetery to my dad and my grandmothers.
My mom was always a homemaker, when we got home from school she was here waiting for us, she cared for 4 children and my paternal grandmother, not to mention my dad. She was a wonderful mother, very loving, very attentive to her children. She raised all her children the same, treated us as fairly as life permitted, showed us all the same amount of love. My mom played baseball in the street with us when we were short one person, she roller skated with us, rode bikes, hula hooped, she loved spending time with her kids.
All this brings me to today. Today was my mother’s 83rd birthday. Her birthday, like everyone else’s, is on the same day every year.. it always has been. Today, like last year and probably the year before, neither my brother nor my sister showed up to wish my mom a Happy Birthday. My sister called earlier today, for some reason other than it being my mom’s birthday, she never told me to tell mom Happy Birthday, she never asked how mom was today. Yesterday my sister was here for less than 5 minutes, she never told my mom Happy Birthday then. I have the hardest time with this. My brother is the same way. I can’t remember the last time he actually showed up on a holiday to see my mom. Birthdays and Holidays are for family. My mom is the MOTHER, the QUEEN of this family. I feel they are being disrespectful and I hate it. I think it bothers me more than it bothers my mom.
We had a good day for mom’s birthday. Mom, my boys and I were just home together, I fixed a nice dinner for us, we had a few presents for mom, her favorite candy bars and a can of cashews. We gave her a little poinsettia plant and some leg warmers for the cold.. My mom couldn’t of been more happy. She is so easy to please, such a warm loving person and my brother and sister are sure missing out.
Just venting!!!
Hi–That is really painful. And, at some point, it would be nice if the could also show support for you. It’s hard to understand. Sounds like you created a wonderful day for your mom, despite the siblings. And, I LOVE the photo.
Thank you Denise… that’s me in the front!!!
Dear LilliJ
Your mom has not missed out on anything–thanks to you and your family. She was and is a very lovely woman. I love the picture with the family and the dog. She is so lucky to have you and your kids.
I agree with Jackie. Your Mom is not missing out on anything, because she has you. Your siblings are the ones that are missing out. Thank you for being there for your Mom.
Thank you for your wonderful comments, but it sure doesn’t make me any more happy about my siblings!!!