Even If a Choice, It’s Still Difficult

Feb 20 2010 in , by Denise

Today on Your Caregiving Journey, Donna Ryan joined us to talk about her recent trip to Atlanta with her mom. (You can listen to our discussion via the player at the bottom of this post.)

Toward the end of the show, we talked about the worry about discussing caregiving with non-caregiving friends. With the worry comes the concern that complaining could be misinterpreted as being disrespectful to a caree.

This conversation reminded me of another I recently had with another family caregiver. She, like Donna, made the decision to move her mom into her home. She, as does Donna, recognizes this decision as a choice. They both made a choice that having their caree live with them would best.

The family caregiver felt terribly guilty about expressing any frustration about her mom or her caregiving situation. It’s my choice, she said. I must just bear it.

It’s important to remember that within the choice lies difficulties. To vent about those difficulties is healthy. Expressing the sadness, loneliness and frustration of caregiving will help you find ways to manage the sadness, loneliness and frustration.

Making a choice about caregiving doesn’t mean you’ve also chosen to silently bear the difficulties. Share those difficulties with those who can understand and support so you can continue to feel good about your choice.

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