No Experience Wasted

I hadn’t had a chance to listen to Wednesday’s blog radio program with Mabel R. who takes care of her husband. Tonight I had a chance to do that. Even though Mabel’s husband’s disease is different than my own husband’s disease I can relate to some of her feelings in many ways.

Although I would find it very difficult to take care of a parent, I believe in many ways taking care of my husband is more painful. As Mabel pointed out, a relationship with a spouse was and is an intimate adult relationship. When that begins to take on a more caregiver-caree relationship instead of a husband-wife relationship that is a painful transition. I know I have grown stronger emotionally as a result, but it is still a painful transition.

Another thing came out in Denise’s interview with Mabel also, however. Some of Mabel’s dreams of writing came as a direct result of her difficult care giving experiences. Although I am not seeking to write a book like Mabel, I believe some of my writing both at my Scriptural devotional blog site and now here at care giving.com has come as a direct result of some difficult experiences we have had to go through the last few years especially with Wayne’s disease, my battle with breast cancer in 2007 and 2008, and even some difficult situations before that. Writing has to be based on something and must be felt from the heart; and, hence, the best writing is sometimes based on lessons learned during difficult times.

Also my dream of being less afraid to speak what is on my heart to others, to be unafraid to speak in front of a group, and to accept love and help from others has begun to be a reality because of the difficulties of the last years. I’ve sensed a new freedom I did not use to possess.

My faith in my God had also grown. Although I still fight panic, fear, and depression at times, I see God working things out so often in my life often through the love of other people. One of the ways this has been shown is by many people from our church seemingly “coming out of the woodwork” offering to help us with various aspects of moving. (We are moving from an apartment to a condo on Feb.20, although I am starting to move little things next week.)

So many things are falling in place for our move because of the prayers and love of other people. One exciting development was the installation this past week of a very workable wheelchair ramp at our new condo for my husband. God is good, and no circumstance including the difficulties of care giving are wasted. My care giving hopefully helps my husband. As unpleasant as it can be, it also helps me to become all that I was meant to be.