Yesterday on Your Caregiving Journey, Dr. Jamie Huysman, co-author of Take Your Oxygen First: Protecting Your Health & Happiness while Caring for Someone with Memory Loss, joined us to share tips on keeping your marriage in a good space. (You can listen to our show via the player at the bottom of the post.)
During yesterday’s show, we focused our discussion on marriages in which one spouse cares for another family member or friend. Last week, we aired a show for spouses caring for their spouses.
We often talk about taking care of yourself but we sometimes minimize its importance by saying that it’s good for your caree. It’s just good for you for so many reasons, including and especially because a good you helps keep your marriage working well.
Our perceptions become projections, Dr. J. said. It’s important to protect our perceptions from the impact of stress, which can cause us to see more negatives than positives. When we release anxiety, we increase our energy. We bring that increased energy to our relationships. Touch can be a great stress fighter, he says.
The two currencies in a marriage, Dr. J. said, are communication and trust. Guidelines about how we communicate (including fight fair) keep us safe. Dr. J. defines trust as: To Reach Ultimate Success Together. He encourages spouses to be fair, consistent and available with each other.
Dr. J.’s final tips to married couples:
1. Listen
2. Take time to talk
3. Share a hug and kiss whenever you can.
So, we’d love to know: How do you ensure your marriage stays healthy?
Resources
“The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz (You can purchase
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