Picnics, Parades, Parties

I have written about how even though this is my favorite time of  year, it is also my worst time.  This is the season of picnics and parades and outdoor parties.  We do get invites, but often the work involved to for both of us to attend is just too much.  Setting up one or more sitters for mom so that we can go to a gathering, and not watch the time to rush back home.  It is no fun at all when we have...

Latest Developments

My mother-in-law’s health has taken a sharp turn down. In the last few days she had pretty well stayed in bed all day and has eaten next to nothing. It just takes too much of her energy to get up. It looks like we could be talking weeks only, but none of us knows that for sure. I did visit her awhile yesterday afternoon. She did seem to enjoy that and was reasonably cheery. I feel so torn, because I feel...

Oh Poo!

This is going to take a lot out of me but it is so heavy on my heart, I’m thinking maybe if I type it out and post it, you know, put it on paper, it will make things easier for me. Annie died in May of 2008, two years ago, when Julian, her youngest, was only a little more than a month from being 5 years old. During this past year I have been spending a lot of time with Julian, he comes to my house almost...

Embracing the Differences

This afternoon on Your Caregiving Journey, Dr. Barry Jacobs, author of “The Emotional Survival Guide for Caregivers,” joined us for a discussion about gender differences in caregiving. Our conversation was sparked by a review of research released earlier this month indicating that the caregiving toll is harder on women. You can listen to our discussion via the player at the bottom of this post. Barry...

This Week’s Poll: Can You Take Time Off to Recharge?

In this week’s poll, sponsored by Caregiving.com and eCareDiary.com, we wonder: Do you get time off to recharge your batteries? Do You Get Time Off From Caregiving to Recharge Your Batteries?customer surveys Thanks for...

Decisions from the Head and Heart

This morning in Your Caregiving Journey, Viki Kind joined us to discuss her new book, “The Caregiver’s Path to Compassionate Decision Making.” You can listen to our discussion via the player at the bottom of this post. Viki and I spoke about the five core questions she suggests you ask yourself as you determine how and when to make a decision on behalf of a caree. The questions are: 1. Does the...

First

Today is the first day of summer. What will be a first for you today? Perhaps this will be the first day you consider your priorities and then put boundaries in place to protect those priorities. Maybe this is the first day you decide that sadness and happiness can coincide within a day, that sadness does not exclude happiness. Today may be the first day you decide a painful situation deserves a better outcome. The...

Movie Monday: Two Sides of Fear

This week, I watched “An Eduction” and “Hotel Rwanda.” I liked “An Education” and would recommend, but with reservations. Set in 1961 London, “An Education” tells the story of an affair between a 16-year-old and an much older man. My niece didn’t like the movie because the relationship was “too creepy.” True. For me, the movie wasn’t so much...

Harsh Realities

I’ve finally had a couple of full night’s sleep this weekend. Still tired, but not exhausted as I have been over the last month or so. We had someone from Hospice out Thursday to let us know what services are offered for my mom – it was a good conversation and intellectually everything made sense. A few hours later, however, my mother and I shared our first cry about her condition and the position in...

Stepping Back…

We have been working for the past couple of weeks on putting rock down around the flower beds in the yard.  Two things that I really love are horses, and also the ocean (which I miss– being  here in PA vs. New England). So….for my birthday, I wanted to change the flower beds from mulch to river rock, thinking it would make things look a little more “beachy”.  I never envisioned how...

How… Will You Be Happy Today?

“When making your choice in life, do not neglect to live.” ~ Dr. Samuel Johnson Sometimes, it can feel that all you know is sadness. You feel sad for yourself, sad for your caree, sad for other family caregivers. Today, for a few moments, sadness sits in the backseat. It’s Saturday, the day we turn our focus to knowing moments of happiness. So, be sure to share with us: How will you be happy...

Transitions, Part 2

We’ve made it through our week of transitions. I started out looking at the week as Steve and our son’s transitions, not thinking of them as mine, and not realizing how much their transitions have an impact on me. I’ve caught myself overreacting a few times this week, actually more times than I realized until I typed this sentence. I got upset, but laughed hysterically at Steve’s suggestion that I do...

Truth and Dare

Today on Your Caregiving Journey, Anna Stookey joined us to continue our conversation about getting more help. You can listen to our show via the player at the bottom of the post. Last month, we spoke about Self-Sufficiency Syndrome. Today, we took a closer look at those in the family who don’t help. And, as happens, when we look at others we turn to ourselves. Anna shared an important an insight this...

Beginning Our Story

Bryce and I may not have experienced love at first sight, but I’d call it something pretty darn close.  We’re your online meeting success story: two busy twenty-somethings who’d both dated sitcom-worthy casts of characters and had no more excuses.  Why not trust relationship compatibility to a computer system claiming to have it all figured out?  We surely hadn’t had any better luck trusting our own...

Tell Us: How Does Caregiving Touch a Wound for You?

Last Saturday, Donna Webb joined me on Your Caregiving Journey; we spoke about her caregiving experience, as well as her recovery from a pinched nerve. She spoke about an injury she sustained years ago which flared recently because of too much time in front of the computer and physical caregiving. As she spoke, a thought occurred to me: Caregiving can touch dormant wounds, both physical and emotional. A bum knee or...

Early Thursday morning – 6/17

Hello fellow caregivers. In case you’re not familiar with me, my name is Derek, one of the occasional family bloggers here on Caregiving.com. I work full time and take care of both of my parents: mom lives with me and dad is on hospice in a nursing home. I’ve not participated for several months because of an always challenging and often overwhelming set of circumstances; not unique to this group...

Managing Worry When Worry Is Normal

Karol Ward, author of Worried Sick, re-joined us today on Your Caregiving Journey to share ideas on managing chronic worry. You can listen to our show via the player at the bottom of the post. In a caregiving situation, worry is as normal as those feelings of guilt, anger and resentment. Because of what caregiving is, you can’t help but worry. Karol describes worry as the way we get control over what we fear...

How… Will You Add Your Future Today?

Members of one of our online support groups have recently been discussing their futures and their worry about their futures. They worry: Have they sacrificed so much in their caregiving role that they’ve waited too long for their future? Their discussion reminded me of a support group member from about 10 years ago. She cared for her mom, who lived with her, her husband and her children. She loved her family...

Homewatch CareGivers Announces 2010 Family Caregiver of the Year Award

Homewatch CareGivers launched its “Family Caregiver of the Year” award program today. Nominations will be accepted through July 31 at www.homewatchcaregivers.com, or by submitting a nomination form to one of the company’s 170+ offices nationwide. In addition to local awards, nominees have the opportunity to win scholarships to Homewatch CareGivers University and a $5,000 grand prize. The Family Caregiver of...

Family Time

Wednesday night of last week through Monday morning of this week my son from IA, his wife, and two little daughters were here. It had been a while since they had been here, so it was wonderful having them here. There were a lot of different emotions that I felt while they were here, however. I felt moments of joy, some sadness, and some stress. I felt joy the day we went down to our State Park near Lake...

It’s World Elder Abuse Awareness Day

Today is World Elder Abuse Awareness Day, sponsored by The International Network for the Prevention of Elder Abuse. Today, communities and municipalities will make proclamations declaring June 15, 2010 as World Elder Abuse Awareness Day (WEAAD) and hold events designed to raise their communities’ awareness of elder abuse. The first Awareness Day in 2006 involved several hundred organizations and governmental...

This Week’s Poll: Are You a Caregiving Frequent Flyer?

In this week’s poll, sponsored by Caregiving.com and eCareDiary.com, we wonder: How many times have you been a family caregiver? In other words, are you a Caregiving Frequent Flyer? How Many Times Have You Been in a Caregiving Role?Market...