A Life Line: The Worst
Jun 30 2011 in Denise's Blog, Life Line, Life Lines, Videos by Denise
In a caregiving role, you may find yourself thinking: This is the worst. My life is the worst life ever.
I’ve been thinking, What’s the worst thing that can happen? In this Life Line, I offer my perspective on what really is the worst thing that can happen to us. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments section, below.
Sharon said on June 30, 2011
Thanks, Denise. I guess part of the reason for grief and pain in our lives is being able to connect with others who are going through similiar situations or who are also grieving.
Bette said on July 22, 2011
Thank you Denise for these words. They were particularly helpful this morning.
My mother doesn’t know who I am today. This hasn’t happened in quite some time, so it was a bit startling for me this morning.
As I was getting her up and dressed, she noticed my feet (I had bare feet as did she) – she paused and looked at our feet. She started smiling, with a bit of a giggle, she said: “look, we have the same”. It lightened the moment for both of us; I thought of this Life Line.
I know this connection may sound small or brief, but when all else seems very cloudy, this was clarity that I so needed.
I was grateful for your video because it reminded me to pause and notice the connection.
I’m realizing the importance of appreciating a connection– particularly in dementia.
I’m so glad I noticed, now I’m hopeful for more.
Trish said on July 22, 2011
Oh, Bette, that must have been startling when she didn’t recognize you. The recognition of the similarities in feet is delightful. I want to believe that even though she says she doesn’t recognize you, that on some level she does. Even if it’s at the foot level!
Wishing you a better day and good weekend.
Bette said on July 23, 2011
Hi Trish,
Thank you so much. A much better day today.
I’m beginning to think, and working on accepting, that the challenging times (no matter how challenging), are so worth it, because of the connections–even when so small. I’m trying very hard with this one.
Hope you have a good day and nice week-end.
Karen said on July 23, 2011
Hi Bette,
Trish is right–and so are you. I have heard from so many dementia caregivers, and had that experience as well, that on some level our carees recognize a connection with us. Even such a small connection is worth cherishing. I believe that on some level they are always trying to establish that connection, too.
Dementia presents constant challenges, especially emotional challenges. Sometimes it feels just like you’ve been slapped. And then you have to step back and re-assess and re-gain emotional equilibrium. And remember the comfort and safety you provide.
So glad today is better.