Things Are Going a Bit Better Here
Jul 22 2011 in The Unit Known As Shandi's blog by The Unit Known as Shandi
A few things have improved around here this week.
1) We have a new nurse case manager with Hospice. She is amazing and supportive. She’s helped me with the fine line of keeping Mom comfortable, but also able to respond. Mom is drinking small amounts this morning (no fluids since Monday until today), but is also lucid and comfortable. I feel like we’ve found that “happy medium.” I feel supported rather than on the defensive like I was with our old case manager.
2) One of my brothers is coming this weekend for moral support and respite. The other brother had a vacation planned with his wife and grandchildren, but told me last night that he would stay home to support me. With the way I felt yesterday (at a critical point with the meds and Mom’s fluid intake, and trying to figure out which way to go), I needed him. This morning, after finding that balance, I called him back and told him that I’d be fine, and to go and have a great time. Just the fact that he was willing to stay home with me gave me much moral support!
3) My sister is having a hip replacement in August, and she’s putting together the care she needs to recover from that. I’ve been concerned about her, so this is a relief.
4) The sun is out. I know that for those of you enduring a heat wave, that might not seem like a great thing. We have had 78 minutes of weather over 80 degrees the whole summer, and tons of rain. It’s been a very depressing month, and the weather has added to it!
5) I’m at peace about Mom’s care and the decisions we’ve made this week. I know I’ve done everything that she asked. She’ll either improve or she won’t. Either way, I can live with myself after she’s gone. I’ve honored her wishes and she knows she’s loved.
6) The Infectious Disease doctor and his nurse have been amazing, and I am so glad we’ve got them “on board.” They’ve been available, caring and have had the answers to the questions I’ve been trying to get answered all year.
I think that’s it!
Trish said on July 22, 2011
Shandi, I hear peace and relief in your post. It makes me want to take a deep breath with you! Kudos to your brothers for stepping up and kudos to you for getting a new hospice nurse on board. That in itself must have helped tremendously. Thinking of you this weekend and hoping peace and comfort continue for you and your mom. Take care.
Karen said on July 22, 2011
I’m so glad to hear that you’ve got some good people on board with you. And you are truly blessed to have siblings that are willing to step up and help.
Most important of all is that your Mom knows she’s loved and that you know that you have done and are doing your best for her.
Sharon said on July 22, 2011
Shandi, I can feel the relief and peace in your post. I am so glad that you have the support you need and that you are able to fulfill your mother’s wishes.
kristin said on July 22, 2011
Shandi, I’m so pleased for you that your rocky road is smoother. Sounds like things are falling into place, and you can rest more easily about everything happening in your life. You’re a trouper – so glad you are getting the support you deserve.
Bette said on July 23, 2011
Hi Shandi,
I’m glad the sun is beginning to shine: outside and in.
I’m so glad for the additional support you are receiving. And, the Infectious Disease doctor and nurse sound like wonderful additions to you and your mom’s team.
What a gift to you, your family has been. Those are definitely memories to always keep close to your heart.
I hope for a restful week-end for you – resting in the comfort of knowing you have many supporting you and your mom, and that you continue to act on your mom’s wishes.
Denise said on July 23, 2011
Hi TUKAS! I’m so glad you’ve found the answers and support you deserve. Hoping today continues to bring peace.
Kathy said on July 24, 2011
Shandi,
I love the calm in your words.
I hope it continues for you.
Meryl said on July 24, 2011
Shandi, I am sorry I haven’t been able to post sooner but I am glad that things are calming down for you a bit. We all make the best choices that we can at the time and sometimes we need to juggle them around a bit before we find the right choice. I am glad that you feel at ease with your decisions as we all know they are not easy to make. I hope you had a peaceful and uneventful weekend((hugs))
G-J said on July 27, 2011
As others have said your relief comes through in your post. I’m glad hospice has been helpful.