Tell Us: How Do You Let Go of Anger?

Yesterday morning, Elizabeth Lombardo, our happiness expert, joined me to discuss how our anger can chase our happiness away. You can listen to our show via the player below. Elizabeth explained that anger is actually a secondary emotion; meaning, another emotion lies below our anger. We may be feeling helpless, sadness, depression, fear or overwhelmed. Our anger also can serve a purpose—propelling us to take...

Ready

At times, I will think: I’m not ready for that. To talk about that. To do that. To know that. At times, I think I will never be ready. And then I do it anyway. Because when I think, I’m not ready, I’m really thinking: I am sooo afraid of what I’ll read. Or what I’ll know. Or what I’ll encounter. Or how I’ll feel. Or what others will say about me. Or how I’ll look. Or...

Webinar Follow-Up: How Will You Manage Family Meetings?

Yesterday, I led our monthly free webinar. This month, I shared tips on how to hold an effective family meeting. (Did you miss the webinar? No worries! It’s archived here.) I’d love to know which tips I shared during the webinar that you’ll incorporate into your family meetings. Please share in our comments section, below. Related Articles Webinar Follow-Up: What’s Your Escape?...

“Will You Show Me How?”

I thought dementia was cruel when I first noticed cognitive declines in my mother back in February. More recently, however, I’m seeing new parts that I did not expect. Recently she has few words to put together and now cannot do anything without instruction. “I think I have to go to the bathroom, will you show me how?” “I want to sit over there, but I don’t know how.” “Can...

Making Changes

For the third time this month, Mom has been hospitalized. Last week she couldn’t breathe again, her pressure was very high and oxygen level was very low. When I got to the hospital, Mom looked terrible. She looked drawn and pale. They diagnosed her this time as having congestive heart failure. Each time she was in the hospital it was for exactly the same symptoms but different diagnosis. After speaking to...

Book Talk

This afternoon on Your Caregiving Journey, G-J led our monthly Caregiving Book Club discussion. Our September pick is my book, The Caregiving Years, Six Stages to a Meaningful Journey. You can listen to our show via the player at the bottom of the post. We spoke about the inspiration for the book, what we both like about it and what’s useful about it. I also read a short excerpt. I hope you enjoy. Thanks so...

Tips for Dementia Care

This morning on Your Caregiving Journey, Claire Day, Vice President of Constituent Services for the Alzheimer’s Association Delaware Valley Chapter, joined me for our monthly show on dementia care. You can listen to our show via the player at the bottom of the post. During the show, Claire answered a question from our chat room about managing incontinence care and two questions emailed to me from a...

Tell Us: What’s the Smartest Thing You’ve Done?

Often, when I look back on my life, I think about the dumb things I’ve done. Ugh, I’ll think, that was so dumb! Once in awhile, my memory will give me a break and dwell on those actions or decisions which were quite smart. Thinking of those smart moments in my life gives me hope that my future will include more smart decisions. So, I’d love to know: What’s the smartest thing you’ve...

Making Contact

November is National Family Caregivers Month. It’s also National Pomegranate Month and International Drum Month to name a few things. I really want to bring attention to National Family Caregivers Month, so I wrote and sent two e-mails today to Christian radio programs.  I contacted both Focus on the Family and Family Life Today. I also plan to contact my local NPR station, TV stations, and newspapers. By...

NAPA Advisory Council Convenes Tomorrow

The advisory council of the National Alzheimer’s Project Act will convene for the first time tomorrow (September 27) at 9:30 a.m. ET  at the Administration on Aging headquarters in Washington, D.C. National Alzheimer’s Project Act, signed into law in January, will create a coordinated national plan to overcome the Alzheimer’s crisis and will ensure the coordination and evaluation of all national efforts...

The Man Behind the Crabby Old Man

In your role as a family caregiver, you’ve most likely experienced judgments about your caree. A doctor may have dismissed your concerns about your caree with a quick comment like, “What do you expect? She’s 95.” Perhaps family members can’t see the meaning your caree brings to your life. Or, maybe, a health care professional talks about your caree rather than talking to him. We live...

Family

Growing up I had such admiration for my older brothers. My oldest brother was married by the time I was three and the younger of the two entered college about five years after that. I didn’t get to spend a lot of time with them, but was so excited when they came home for a visit.  I was an aunt by the time I was four and very excited about that very important job!  (: The admiration of my brothers...

Site of the Week: US Medical Supplies

(Editor’s Note: On a regular basis, we feature a sponsored section of Caregiving.com called Site of the Week. We thank US Medical Supplies for its generous support of Caregiving.com.) In caregiving, you may feel like you spend too much—time, energy, money. US Medical Supplies can help you save. In particular, the company can help you save your back with a variety of lift chairs that meet your needs, your...

Is He Going to Die?

That is the question I’ve been answering all weekend regarding my brother. My daughter casually lobbed it at me while I did laundry and printed off airline boarding passes.  Later I heard a version of it from my sister. The short answer of course is “Yes”. We’re all going to die. We know this quite well in my family. Death is common enough to us that we talk about it openly. What everyone...

Hubby’s Personal Loss

On top of all of Lewy’s problems that plague Hubby, Hubby has had some personally difficult days. Hubby and I went to see a friend who was gravely ill in the hosp and after they moved friend to the Hospice wing. Time constraints and other responsibilities prevented us from visiting one more time, then it was too late. Why do we always think we have one more day? Hubby has taken the loss of his friend...

Where Does She Go?

Things are very quiet here today. My mother doesn’t have many words and, by her eyes and the directions she’s needed,  she’s very confused. It ‘s almost as if she’s in her own bubble – I’m there with her, but there is no communication or connection. This morning when I went in to her bedroom, she had pulled off all the bedding, her PJs, depends—all was on the floor....

Handling Stress

We all know how to handle stress: - eat, but not too much - sleep - exercise - follow a routine but be flexible - lean on others - pray - use the right tool for the problem (ok you might not know this one but it fits… trust me) - eat some chocolate I could’ve of used all of these today. It’s been a long week and an even longer day today. The week had been extended by multiple away soccer...

Tell Us: When Do You Fib?

I love this comment left by Karen yesterday in response to our request for bathing tips: Way back then, the only thing that would get her in the tub was if I told her she had a doctor appt the next day. That usually did it after coaxing for an hour… Needless to say… I told her that every other day! Those little fibs we have to tell… That’s a very hard thing in itself to deal with initially… You don’t...

Go

You were packed and ready. You were at the front door. You were ready to go. Until caregiving came in through the back door. So, you put down your bag. You took of your coat. You stayed. It’s okay that you have moments in your heart when you still want to Go. As you stay, make a compromise with Go. Bring in what you were were going to: A trip, a career, a goal. Maybe the form of the trip, career or goal...

Objectives for Robert; Objectives for New Home

Robert has his second ISP meeting today at New Home. This is where everyone involved in his care (nurse, house manager, supervisor of house manager, speech therapist, regional center rep and me) decide on his “objectives” for the next three months. The last one was just after he moved in to New Home last February (which I realize was more than three months ago but, after the first meeting they wait for the...

You Told Us About Dementia

Last night, we aired our first call-in talk show on Your Caregiving Journey. We asked you to share your answer to this question: What do you know about dementia that the world doesn’t? Thanks so much to those who called in to share with myself and Bette, who helps run the show. You can listen to our show via the player below. Be sure to listen to the end for a terrific insight from Kathy. Our next call-in...

I’m Ready. Will You Help Me?

On Friday morning, Viki Kind, author of The Caregivers Path to Compassionate Decision Making, joined me on Your Caregiving Journey. You can listen to our show via the player at the bottom of the post. Our show focused on how to handle a really tough situation: Your caree, who is not cognitively impaired, makes a conscious decision to stop eating and drinking. In essence, your caree makes the decision to die. The...