Today
Dec 23 2011 in Blogs, Caring for Parents and Kids, Jo's Blog by Jo
Today I went to work. It may be two days before Christmas and relatively quiet but a military base never completely closes.
Today I saw new “Welcome Home” banners posted on the fence line outside the base. A unit must be returning soon. I pray they make it back in time for Christmas, it’ll be close. I remember those days and smile, happy for the returning Marines and their families.
Today I took my Dad to yet another doctor appointment. This was follow-up from the latest round of tests. I was actually hoping for something straightforward like a urinary tract infection. At least that is treatable and would explain the symptoms he’s experiencing, the exhaustion and physical decline. Instead the tests were all negative; a good thing of sorts but I’m left with the painful thought that I’m losing my Dad and once again there is nothing I can do. The morning appointment wiped Dad out and when I checked on him in the afternoon he was sleeping again.
Today I noticed Mom is getting comfortable apart from Dad. Given the direction Dad is heading this could be construed as a good thing. It is significant though given their 66 years together. I also notice Mom is having a harder time recognizing Dad. Also significant given their lengthy marriage.
Today would have been my wedding anniversary. I bought a rose and an anniversary card. The card said in part, “For my wife, wishing we could be together on our anniversary… I hope you know how very much I love you.” I laid the rose on my wife’s grave. The card I’m keeping.
Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. I’m ready for today to be over.
Sharon said on December 23, 2011
Oh, Jo, I can feel the hurt you are feeling tonight. I am so sorry for the declines you are seeing in your parents. Seeing declines in people one loves and knowing one can do nothing about it is so difficult.
I also am tearing up as I read about your anniversary card and rose for your wife. Having lost my husband in Januaray I can understand some of your heartache. It is so difficult, isn’t it? My prayers are with you tonight.
Trish said on December 23, 2011
Sharon, I just want to say that I’m thinking of you during this first Christmas without your husband. Sending you hugs and wishing you as much joy on this Christmas as possible. Trish
Jane said on December 23, 2011
Hi Jo:
I am so sorry for this difficult day for you with it being your anniversary and with your parents both declining in health.
I wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas.
Hugs:o)
Jane ~mom to Nicole, 17 yo, VSD, PAH, Eisenmengers, BHJS
“If you don’t like something change it, if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.”
Meryl said on December 23, 2011
Jo, you are going through so much and I am so sorry. My thoughts are with you.
((hugs))
Bette said on December 23, 2011
Hi Jo,
I’m so sorry.
I’m sorry for how you continue to experience losses in your parents and for what today marks for you.
When my Dad passed away, someone wrote a note to me to hang on to the memories. I so admire how you do that Jo. I hope the memories bring comfort for you and for your children.
As I’m typing this, today is almost over…and I so hope for a better day for you tomorrow.
Thoughts and prayers are with you and your family this week-end.
Trish said on December 23, 2011
Jo, What an emotional day for you. Yet, remarkably, you still have enough in you to be empathetic and concerned for those military families and soldiers. That speaks to the kind of man you are and makes me grateful that someone like you is working at our military bases. (My step-son leaves for boot camp Feb. 7 and I don’t have the best attitude about it. Your example of what the military can do for a person brings me comfort about his decision).
I hope tomorrow brings you better moments and a few laughs with your kids (and parents, if possible). Wishing you and your family a Merry Christmas, Jo.
Denise said on December 24, 2011
Ohhhhh… We keep going because the days keep coming, but I’m sure you’ve often wished for a rewind and pause button to use in life.
I hope today and tomorrow will bring you good moments that will become treasured memories. You are an amazing gift to your family.
Kathy said on December 25, 2011
Jo,
Decline is difficult even when we accept it will come we still wish for the easy fix.
Perhaps your mothers mental separation from your father is a blessing in disguise.
What a year you have had and not to be able to share it with your “rock” your wife. I hope you have found some comfort in the presence of your children.
Thank you Sir for your service and dedication to not only your country, but to your parents, children and wife.
Merry Christmas Jo. May the New Year bring you an extra measure of peace for your heart and mind.
roaringmouse said on January 3, 2012
Dear Jo,
Thank you for fighting for our freedoms.
I wish I could write further but everytime I read that last paragraph..I cry. Your wife was a very special lady who had a very special man at her side.
Hugs!