Well, our visit with the caregiving service’s CEO, Eddie, went about as expected. There was great resistance from Grandma to the talk about someone coming in and visiting while we will be gone for about three days during “the Wedding.” She would only agree to two phone calls during the day and promised to be very careful with herself and maybe not even go in and out the back door (down the steps) to the garage while we are gone. She assured Eddie that she really could take care of herself.

Caregiver CEO was savvy to the way Grandma resisted and has a caregiver in mind that he would like to assign to us. I asked about the kind of service I could ask for, like having caregiver bring lunch to share with Grandma from a nearby restaurant to the house, he said of course. I am hoping to make the caregiving look different than Grandma expects and plan to have this caregiver over to meet Grandma to see how they get along. Yikes! This sounds like arranging my kids’ play dates but this is what we do to make sure everyone is comfortable.

Grandma’s good friend who is 90 was excited about helping me with Grandma. When I suggested that she stay overnight for Saturday night she said of course. But then I told her which day, Saturday before Thanksgiving. I knew it was a long shot because of the date and sure enough, she’s going to her daughter’s house out of town with about 20+ family. I blessed her to go and just thanked her for just being willing.

I let her in on my plan to have a caregiver still come in and visit under the guise of bringing lunch and whatnot during the weekend. I also have a neighbor who has offered to bring in her mail. Grandma’s good friend’s children are pressing her about moving into an assisted living place, so we talked a bit about that. I threw out the idea that maybe Grandma and she could live next to each other in such a situation.

Friend said that she is allowing her children to visit homes and make some selections and I am hoping she’ll be staying here in our town. She has a strong desire to stay here in town but there is some pull to be going up with her daughter and grandkids too.

I promised to take her out to coffee again so we can talk, just the two of us. I felt like it was a mutual encouraging conversation about our lives and living situations. I told her that I can’t thank her enough for her visits that uplift my Grandma and connecting with her while there is so much resistance to being social. Friend told me about how she is resistant to going out and driving but once she gets into the car, she feels much better which is part of her struggle not to be isolated. Her son recently, as in last week, just took her out and evaluated her driving skills and proclaimed her in great condition to drive. This lady is such a jewel.