After the Diagnosis, What Did You Need?

s-docWe’re in the process of creating a product and perhaps a program to help family caregivers new to caregiving because of their caree’s recent hospitalization or diagnosis.

In order to develop the most effective material, we’d love to know about your experiences. Please feel free to share your answers to any or all of these questions in our comments section below:

1. What type of support from doctors, hospital staff or other health care professionals did you initially receive after learning about your caree’s diagnosis or during your caree’s first hospitalization because of an injury?

2. How did other members of your family respond to news of the diagnosis?

3. Looking back, what kind of information and support do you wish you would have received from doctors, hospital staff or other health care professionals at time of diagnosis or during the first hospitalization?

Thanks so much for sharing your insights and experiences.

Avatar of Denise

About Denise Brown

I began working with family caregivers in 1990 and launched in 1996 to help and support them. Through my blog, I share words of comfort and offer coping strategies and tips. I also write opinion pieces about recent research, community programs and media coverage of caregiving issues. I've written several caregiving books, including "The Caregiving Years, Six Stages to a Meaningful Journey," "Take Comfort, Reflections of Hope for Caregivers" and "After Caregiving Ends, A Guide to Beginning Again." You can purchase my books and schedule a coaching call with me in our store.

2 thoughts on “After the Diagnosis, What Did You Need?

  1. Avatar of BusybeeBusybee

    Well let me tell you that I been taking care of my in-laws (Albert & Jenny) for 17 years. They are both disabled. One can’t walk very good because of her knees and the husband is bed all the time because he so weak from the hospital every 2 week. In then out and back in then out.

    About a month a ago the doctor here a say that my father-in-law (Albert) would need to go with Hospice so I had my brother-in-law (Albert) to call his mom (Jenny) and his sister (Jen). Not know that I would be throwing myself under the burning bus.

    So mom (Jenny) asked the doctor that told me that while I was in Charlottesville at appointment with my husband (Robert). That the doctor didn’t say anything like that. I was dum found it. I started crying because they have thought I had lied to they. I was yell at by everyone in the family.

    So I went back to the doctor that said it and he stood by his story that he never said anything about Hospice. I was really to sip nails. I felt like I had let the family down. I had no idea that a doctor could do that to me. I went home and I tried to explain to my husband (Robert) what had happen. He told me it was going to be all right that he believe me.

    So my father-in-law (Albert) is back in the hospital and another doctor had said that we might want to think about Hospice, But this time my mother-in-law (Jenny) heard the doctor say it. But my mother-in-law had cut him down saying that his Primary doctor said that my father-in-law was not ready for Hospice yet. So today I call his Primary doctor and told him what these doctors was saying. I also told him that we all need to be on the same page as a team were ever my father-in-law (Albert) is. He agreed. I told him that he needed to call this doctor and make sure that his information is correct and if this is what my father-in-law wants.

    The staff and nurses and the doctors here have been great to me. The are very surportive when it comes to my father-in-law (Albert). But we all have to be on the same page and work as a team. That is why I let my mother-in-law (Jenny) make all the decision. Because I am just the Daughter-in-law. But my husband (Robert) did say when it comes to push to shove he will step in if his mother (Jenny) can’t make the decisions.

    I hope I did this right. My feeling really got into this one and it also open up some wounds that still hurt.

    • Avatar of DeniseDenise Post author

      I think you handled the situation wonderfully. It’s awful to be the messenger. You are doing all the right things–making sure everyone understands what the doctors are saying and doing your best to keep a team together. That’s a tough spot to be in and it sounds like you are handling with much grace.


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