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ripplesWhen caregiving came, it left in its wake a collection of victims. Your caree is a victim to a disease process; you’re a victim to the situation. You’re both victims to the health care system.

Or so it feels.

Until the fighter in you wakes.

Your fighter may wake because, well, you’re tired of the sleepless nights. Your fighter may wake because you decide you and your caree deserve better. Your fighter may wake because you realize time doesn’t wait for you to figure this out.

Whatever the reason, you’re up, you’re ready.

And, now, because you take charge, because you take command, you create a wake that leaves behind your powerlessness, your submissiveness and your self-pity.

When your fighter wakes, you assert your needs, you set standards for the care your caree receives, you accept no less than what you deserve.

Caregiving can seem like it wins because it takes. You win when you decide you can take.

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About Denise

Profile photo of Denise
I began working with family caregivers in 1990 and launched in 1996 to help and support them. Through my blog, I share words of comfort and offer coping strategies and tips. I also write opinion pieces about recent research, community programs and media coverage of caregiving issues. I've written several caregiving books, including "The Caregiving Years, Six Stages to a Meaningful Journey," "Take Comfort, Reflections of Hope for Caregivers" and "After Caregiving Ends, A Guide to Beginning Again." You can purchase my books and schedule a coaching call with me in our store.

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  1. Profile photo of Busybee

    Thank you so much for the Resourse. If I get the time I would love to chat with you all. Thank you so much again

  2. Profile photo of Bob

    Beautifully said Denise…I think I’m learning to walk thanks to you and I want to creatively, courageously, and caringly walk this journey with my caree as best as I can with my wife. I’m still very much under construction. With gratitude, Bob

  3. Profile photo of

    My husband is alive today because I learned early on in the process to say no when it was appropriate and to fight for him regardless of what they said. I brought him home, when they told me it could not be done, and I learned about his brain, how it recovers, how to help him, how to feed him and most of all to never stop seeking an answer for his problems. The health care system nearly killed him, he went 4 months with hydrochepalus and need a shunt, I took him to 3 hospitals in search of someone to find out what he needed. Had I not he would have died. Loving someone and fighting for them is an answer.

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