I’m at my saturation point and need rest, but I’m not sure how to savor time or get time while I’m with my parents. I just spent I think an hour trying to find a sock that I washed, tore apart my bed to find it, all the while saying to myself, “It’s just a sock.” In turn, my alternate inner voice said, “Yeah, but it’s your way of controlling what you can.” “But it’s a sock…” On and on went the inner dialogue.
Went to the Farmer’s Market today with Mom and Dad, which is usually difficult as far as family dynamics go; Dad has a tendency to dictate and I worry for Mom as he will tell her she knows to put on underwear at night and yells at her, or is it that he’s scared, too? Even if he is scared I wonder, does his yelling affect Mom with her dementia or does she forget? I know it affects me.
And today is my ex-husband’s (or in my heart ex-husband’s) birthday and I’ve celebrated not being with him. Bought some earrings I have no idea how I’m going to pay off, but the experience with the vendor made me so happy. I was not only purchasing jewelry, but making a friend as well and having a conversation regarding my value as a person who needs a partner who respects me for who I am and for what I need. Now that’s another story. For now, how do we climb those mountains that just seem insurmountable?
- Beginning the Transition to More Help (caregiving.com)
- Who Speaks for the Speechless? (caregiving.com)
- More On Caregiving Part 3 (Bonding) (caregiving.com)
- Dementia Care: How Do You Make It? (caregiving.com)
- Frustrating Night (caregiving.com)
- More on Caring For Parents (caregiving.com)
- More on Caring for Parents (Part Two ) (caregiving.com)