When we let those things we feel are unspeakable be said, we become more integrated, whole, and healthier-–an increased experience of well-being—-especially too because of the support, understanding, empathy we receive and the gift you are giving to others.
I have to credit Bob (@rainbow) for that first part and thank you guys for the validation that it’s okay to feel like I’m not doing a good job as a caregiver. The ummmph to say we are not bad caregivers; we are caregivers. We are here.
I started feeling like since I haven’t been able to call about fixing my mom’s wheelchair or I haven’t been able to contact the Alzheimer’s organization that I was not doing my ‘job’, when reality is that the system is a rabbit hole and I get stuck in it and risk losing myself. Then where would I be for my parents? or myself? or you guys?
In trying to keep up with dementia, I just realized I can’t. It’s too random. Been reading a book called “What Alice Forgot” and for some reason something just hit me as Mom and I were cooking dinner. She was cooking potato salad and slammed a fork ( or a spoon ) down saying THAT’S NOT THE WAY YOU DO IT. To me it was silly but I think in Mom’s mind it was losing her identity. There are so many little moments during the day like this that are challenges to handle right, to say “okay.” Alz.org says to respond x way and I don’t. And on it goes and on we swim in the random waves of dementia.
With that said, I’d like to publish these blogs as a book (ack!) and would love any help I can get.
Again, Bless You All . . . or Namaste . . . whatever you please! il
- The Heart of a Caregiver (caregiving.com)
- Is Caregiving a Burden? (caregiving.com)
- Dementia Care: How Do I Handle the Caree’s Anger and Frustration? (caregiving.com)
- Job Jar Day Is Saturday! (caregiving.com)
- Under Water (caregiving.com)
- Avoiding Self-Pity (caregiving.com)
- In Six Words, What’s a Caregiving Day Like? (caregiving.com)
- Who Speaks for the Speechless? (caregiving.com)
- Video Chat: Why Don’t Family Caregivers Like Online Tools? (caregiving.com)
- ARGH!!! to “Family Caregivers Don’t Self-Identify” (caregiving.com)