Who Knew? Who Remembered?
Perhaps you mentioned it and I just didn’t remember or I forgot to write this one down. Change makes my Grandma crazy!
Well, it wasn’t a big change, just a needed one – the thermostat for the heating/cooling system. After about a month now, the thermostat has become a very hot source of control in our house. I wish I could wave a wand and make it understandable for Grandma. The original thermostat had lots of programs and even when it was programmed last year, she had to tinker with it. Fortunately, it would always revert to the original program.
Now, Mr. Control and Ms. Dementia have come to visit at the same time. Grandma has been turning off the A/C because she thinks it is running 24 hours without stopping. She says she hears it running at night. I have come home and she says the A/C isn’t working and it’s too hot, it’s that thermostat. She’s turned off the unit. I turn it on and she says well, it’s been too cold and the thermostat just doesn’t work. I use my soothing voice and words saying that it is fine now.
This morning a different tact was taken. She announced that she knows why that old thermostat didn’t work: “It just needed batteries!” She then quizzes AwesomeHubby, “What did you DO with that thermostat? Where did you put it?” He explained that we threw it away because it didn’t work after we put new batteries in it. She was grumpy after that. She asked at least four more times within the next 48 hours and we tried not to laugh when it came up again as if it was a new topic.
Monday evening AwesomeHubby couldn’t contain himself and decided to have “THE CONVERSATION.” If Grandma was rational, it was the appropriate conversation but all it accomplished was to make him feel better to have laid down some things to her that needed to be said, in his mind anyway. The response from Elly was that she was indignant and defensive, she enjoyed the argument. We had a very tense 24 hours later with terse responses from Elly as we continued to treat her with smiles and happiness. AwesomeHubby understands now that what you dish out, you get back.
For all I know this will get worse before it gets better but we are learning to soothe and “Be The Ointment.” A friend reassured me that we are in the hardest place because Elly is in the “in-between” phase. She knows there is not quite something right with her memory but can’t identify the problem and is becoming a little more aware. I did read that doctors are using a smartphone app to help diagnose dementia which is faster than previous tests. It is not available to the public, good thing, because I would take it myself at this point!
I learned in my caregiving class last week that it is us who can change, not my Grandma! This is what I remind AwesomeHubby during our time together, he appreciates it!
- Another Deep Breath, Just Two More Days! (caregiving.com)
- Vacation Was Good (caregiving.com)
- My Losses (caregiving.com)
- Fighting Fair (caregiving.com)
- Gamer Grandma (caregiving.com)
- My Mama Is a Rockstarr (caregiving.com)
- Constricted (caregiving.com)
- I’m Sorry, Grandma. Tomorrow Will Be Better. (caregiving.com)
- If You Can Go, Then Go! (caregiving.com)