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Home > Blogs > Caring for Two > Mom and Her Future, an Update

Mom and Her Future, an Update

caution-depression-ahead-400x298Here is a follow-up to my recent post about my concerns for my mom and how I can help her with her depression.

I have taken numerous psychology classes in the attempts to become a psychologist and help those with disabilities and, more to the point, chronic pain and depression. When I was looking for a psychologist to discuss my own depression and chronic pain from my accident, there were none that had dealt with chronic pain to the point where I was. I know what is needed to help Mom, I know I need to make sure she gets the best care possible, that she does not become a shut-in and that I check in on her daily, or at least set up so that someone in the family calls her every day. Those with depression need contact, they need that trip to the coffee shop to sit and just talk about anything. But I have to let her be the one to start that conversation. I, or I should actually be saying “We” as in the entire family, need to be making sure that she does not miss any of her psychiatric or medical appointments and, finally, that she does not start into a downward spiral.

The main issue most of us have is we want to help in any way possible, we want to fix, repair, offer a better way of doing something because it makes us feel as if we are helping. Yes, I know I can’t fix what she has going on inside her and that I can only stand back and make sure when she starts veering off the road or path she’s on that I’m there to nudge her back on until she stops seeing the “Depression Ahead” detour signs. But like any good son/daughter, friend, husband/wife, I will be sitting in the passenger seat and agree to be the navigator for this trip. If you know of someone with depression, be there for them, listen, don’t talk. On that note I will leave you with this saying that I heard a long time ago and remember to this date:

“You can not listen if your mouth is moving.” – Author Unknown

P.S. And to my voice of reason, Thank You.

About Richard

Avatar of Richard
My name is Richard (@kreisr1), I am a partial caregiver to my mother who has COPD among other health issues.  I am also a co-caregiver for my brother in-law who has had epilepsy his entire life and now after living alone, in a care facility and a group home setting we had to move him in with us to provide him with the care he needs.  Finally, with my wife who is also my co-caregiver I care for myself, I have had chronic pain (mid-low back) for 21-1/2 years thanks to a drunk driver.  I write my own blog, pickyourpain.org where I share my pain with humor, as I see thing, "Pain Without Humor is Just Painful."  I am involved with caregiving.com in several ways, as well as participating in several of the weekly caregiving.com blogs, I also am involved in their Twitter chats, I also host the following groups, SPOT (Stamp Procrastination Out Today), A Task A Day, The Men's Group, Healthy Caregiver and several others.  I am also the moderator for the Caregiving.com Quiz Show and have a seat on the bi-monthly Hot Topic's show. I'm here to not only improve Roberts life, the lives of those I touch on caregiving.com and pickyourpain.org but to find a way to improve my own live.

2 comments

  1. Avatar of Trish

    You’re doing great, Richard. It’s tough to see someone you love go through depression but we’ll help her through.

  2. Avatar of ejourneys

    I love the quote! And I love your approach as navigator.

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