This past holiday season my mom and I were recipients of gifts that made us both stare into space in wonder. What kind of wonder? Well, it wasn’t wonderful.
I know people mean well. You’re saying, “It’s the thought that counts.” Right?
Wrong! If my mom has really bad arthritis and dementia where is she going to wear sparkly scarves and low cut sweaters? Back in the day mom was a fashionista. She was more like Audrey Hepburn, though not a burlesque queen. Unless the package got mixed up and that was my gift? I am very conservative too so I don’t know who that gift was for.
She also got a knee-length robe with a long belt. That was nice but sometimes belts come a loose and she may fall down the stairs. I ended up keeping that one for myself and I traded her for some very pretty slipper socks that she liked right away. We were like kids comparing candy after trick or treating. “I’ll trade you a robe for your ruby red slippers, my pretty.” Mom still has a sense of humor and she was dying laughing at my wicked witch voice.
Then there’s the food. Mom has dementia so she doesn’t remember sometimes if she has s eaten or not. Every time I turned around someone was saying, “Just indulge her, Angie, it’s the holidays.” Needless to say, Mom had a sugar high and didn’t go to sleep until midnight on Christmas. She ate blueberry cheesecake, candies, cake and cake pops. Then as I was putting them away she claimed she didn’t get holiday goodies like everyone else. Gee, thanks, family.
It was very nice that my older brother bought me a special made Chinese cheesecake from San Francisco. My birthday is right after Christmas and that was very sweet (sweet pun intended) of him. He is trying to have a better relationship with Mom and he bought her gifts. She was so happy to see him. He also had a special no-sugar cake made for her that said, “Merry Christmas, Mom” that was so cute and thoughtful.
Also the ghost of Christmas pasts reminded us to hide the meat so certain relatives wouldn’t take too much food home. We laid out the awesome smoked turkey my hubby BBq’d on a pretty platter in small slices, which deterred the one relative who brings tupperware to our home and takes food samples to the extreme. Her kids are grown now and she has a good job but still loves to hoard left overs. Not this year. Not on my watch! Hubby and I had it planned this time.
So, all in all, it wasn’t too bad it didn’t end in Mom going to the ER like a few Christmas’s ago and no one fell in the hot tub and the dog didn’t steal the cake. Mom kept her dentures in, too!
So, with careful re-gifting and food storage, the holidays can be enjoyed by both carees and caregivers.
Well, that’s my recap of our holiday. Until next time when we move on to Valentine’s Day for more adventures and dentures.
- Dementia, Drumsticks and Dressing (caregiving.com)
- A Cheat Sheet: Your Boss Wants You to Manage his Mom’s Care (caregiving.com)
- How Employers Can Help Their Caregiving Employees (caregiving.com)
- Worrying That, in the End, You’ll be Cheated (caregiving.com)
- Our Caregiving Year in Review (caregiving.com)
- Little Difference in Caregiving Responsibilities Between Working and Non-Working Family Caregivers (caregiving.com)
- 17 Reasons Why Caregiving Makes You Awesome (caregiving.com)
- 10 Tips for Family Caregivers: 10 Great Apps (caregiving.com)