Helping You Work Well with Family Caregivers

The Caregiving Years: Questions to Ask Along the Journey Just as a family caregiver has a differing role in each stage, so do you as a health care professional. We've come up with a series of questions you can ask family caregivers based on the stage of their journey. The purpose of questioning is to best understand the family caregiver's needs and to help them prepare for the future. Read The Caregiving Years: Six Stages to a Meaningful Journey Stage I: "The Expectant Caregiver" Profile: --Has a growing concern that within the next 12 to 18 months or so, an aging relative will need more and more assistance and time. --Concerned because of the relative's age, past and present medical condition, and current living condition. Your Role: To help the caregiver prepare for his or her upcoming role. When an "expectant caregiver" contacts you, what questions should you ask to better understand how to help her? 1. Have you consulted with a good lawyer familiar with eldercare issues? 2. Are you aware of you aging relative's financial situation? 3. Are you aware of community health care options? 4. Who are the current health care providers? Who is the physician? What medications have been prescribed? 5. What is the reality of the situation? 6. What is your current support system? Who can you turn to when you feel depressed? Lost? Uncertain? Stage II: "The Freshman Caregiver" Profile: --Involved in caring for an aging relative for six months to 18 months. --Duties range from errand-running and bill-paying to hands-on care. Your Role: To encourage the caregiver to experiment with different services, organizations and agencies and to help them develop their "caregiving personality". When a "freshman caregiver" contacts you, what questions should you ask to better understand how to help her? 1. Are you comfortable with the knowledge you have about your aging relative's illness, disease or condition? 2. Are you comfortable providing care to your aging relative? 3. How are you coping with the stress of caregiving? 4. Can you get regular breaks from caregiving? 5. Are you currently using services from community organizations? 6. What are the wishes of your aging relative? 7. Are you keeping a journal? Stage III: "The Entrenched Caregiver" Profile: --A family caregiver for two to five years. --Constant involvement, most likely daily, as a caregiver. --May wonder, how much longer can she live this way? --Mood vacillates-is sometimes upbeat-she's proud she's been able to provide such wonderful care and make decisions that support her care recipient's best wishes. And sometimes melancholy--why her? --Mourns the loss of her care recipient's abilities and functions and often longs for the days before caregiving. --Is very tired. Your Role: To help the caregiver develop a regular routine and a familiar schedule. Stability will help the caregiver better manage the overwhelming stress of providing on-going care. When an "entrenched caregiver" contacts you, what questions should you ask to better understand how to help her? 1. Have you determined your limits as a caregiver? 2. Are you getting regular breaks? 3. Are you maintaining a regular support system? 4. Have you updated your knowledge of your care recipient's illness? 5. Are you comfortable handling your care recipient's changing care needs? Stage IV: "The Pragmatic Caregiver" Profile: --A "seasoned" caregiver for more than five years. --Seems doubtful of any advice from health care professionals, especially the "young ones". --Finds humor in situations that you may find offensive. Your Role: To help the caregiver gain a better understanding of herself and her care recipient. When a "pragmatic caregiver" contacts you, what questions should you ask to better understand how to best help her? 1. Are you enjoying time with your care recipient? 2. Have you resolved painful issues with your care recipient? 3. Do you spend time together away from your caregiving responsibilities? 4. Have you thought about your future? Stage V: "The Transitioning Caregiver" --A multi-year caregiver --Experiencing a change in role of caregiver (the care recipient has died or been recently placed in a nursing home) or a change is on the horizon (the care recipient is dying or about to be placed in a nursing home) Your Role: To assist the care recipient and the family caregiver in making the most of their time together and to help the caregiver prepare for the future. If a "transitioning caregiver" contacts you, what questions should you ask to better understand how to best help her? 1. Are you finding the most appropriate outlet for your grief and sadness? 2. Are you allowing yourself time to remember and love your care recipient? 3. How do you feel about your caregiving experience? 4. Have you kept a journal to reflect your emotions and feelings? Stage VI: "The Godspeed Caregiver" --The role of caregiver ended more than two years ago. --Is compelled to make a difference in the lives of other caregivers. Your Role: To create opportunities for the caregiver to share lessons learned and wisdom gained from the journey. When a "Godspeed caregiver" contacts, what questions should you ask to better understand how to help her? 1. Are you following your dreams? 2. What are your favorite memories of your care recipient? 3. Would you like to volunteer with us to mentor family caregivers? Based on the information you garner because of your question, you can make appropriate referrals to the community for the family caregiver. Based on the manual, The Caregiving Years, Six Stages to a Meaningful Journey, a Manual for Health Care Professionals by Denise M. Brown. The manual explains the concept; offers ways health care professionals can implement it to foster better relationships with family caregivers; and includes common stumbles made by health care professionals and how to steady them. Posters, perfect for display in offices and waiting rooms, are also available for purchase. Tell a friend about this article:

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