1. Got the house in order.
2. Got a lot of work done.
3. Went to bed early. (This early to bed is just awesome.)
1. Had a great #carechat.
2. A very productive day.
3. Took a moment to relax.
1. Received an unexpected gift of time.
2. Enjoyed coffee at Panera–which I love.
3. Had a good time with 6-year-old…[Read more]
(Editor’s Note: Today, we welcome Ray, who cares for his brother, to our blogging team. You can connect with Ray on his profile page: @rjrsm.)
I’m new to this site, but not to the issue of caregiving. I’m one […]
Welcome, Ray, and wow — that’s just it, isn’t it? When I was a caregiver for my mother, I heard (constantly) what a “wonderful,” “caring,” and “responsible” daughter I was. In fact, I heard that comment again today, four and one-half months after my mother’s death. In my case, I didn’t feel noble nor honorable. I wasn’t always the “good…[Read more]
Hi Ray–I’m so glad you are blogging!
I think it’s so hard when we hit the limits of ourselves, of our carees and of life. And, somehow we take on these limits as our failures when they truly aren’t.
I know the future feels incredibly uncertain. I wonder if it would help to focus on taking it one day at a time, which helps you tackle the…[Read more]
It seems that the universal feeling of caregivers is guilt! At least part of the time, if not an ongoing struggle to quench it.
I’m wondering how old is your brother? Is he social? Does he like being around other people? Has he ever lived anywhere besides the family home? When I was a kid I vowed to bring my brother to live with me…[Read more]
that was supposed to be quelch not quench… down auto correct.
I want to thank those who replied to my post for the thoughtful suggestions and comments. It does help to see there are others out there who share a sensitivity to care givers.
I chose to keep my brother at home after our mother passed because of his age (59) and traumatizing him with another life changeing event – another home. Fortunately, I…[Read more]
Hi Ray–I’m soooo glad to hear about your good day. It’s so hard to find that sweet spot of how much you help and when you step back. It certainly is a work in progress.
Learning about unconditional love from your brother is such a gift. I think that’s one thing that others often don’t understand about caregiving. Sure, we give. But, we also…[Read more]
Denise…If there is any one BIG blessing in caregiving that I have received, it’s the exchange of unconditional love. When both of my parents came home with hospice, I made the decision I wanted to do all I could for as long as I could. I wanted no regrets. The experience of being with first my father and then my mother as their life faded away…[Read more]
60 Minutes aired an incredible segment last night. (Read about and watch the segment, Ending Life.)
Barbara Mancini, a nurse, cared for her 93-year-old father in his home. During his life’s last years, her […]
Spike and I endured a similar experience when he claimed asylum at hospital B from hospital A for bad treatment (a gross understatement). I had so much mistrust for the system and having been escorted by security at B…I didn’t trust that A would help. While sick he had to do it himself. While it was not death…unlike the story noted…[Read more]
Since my days in the seminary, I have had a change of opinion on the subject of assisted suicide. My seminary training taught me that suicide was a sin and assisted suicide is murder, somewhere along those fine lines in Church teaching, lies the debate on abortion too. Oh-Boy, how my opinion has changed over the years!
After watching, caring…[Read more]
I was flabbergasted at what Barbara Mancini went through with her father. And her poor father fearing what was happening to his daughter as he was dying.
I have always said I do not want to live with dementia. I wouldn’t want any life saving drugs or other medical measures if my quality of life was nil. But even with an advanced directive, who…[Read more]
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