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Caring for Spouses

Read the blogs of those who care for spouses.

Entry 2: May 22, 2015


Smiles and feesl good about those who replied to my first blog post. Nice to know you read it. Took hubby back to the Indian Hospital Urgent Care this morning for another medication they want him to take. We went prepared for the usual three-hour wait but were in and out in 15 minutes.  Then we were able to do our banking and grocery run all before the rain set in. I made him sit ...

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Entry 1: May 21, 2015


(Editor’s Note: Today, we welcome Carol to our blogging team. You can connect with Carol on her profile page: @carolk.) Having never written anything that goes into a blog, I decided to see how this goes. after I got a note from Denise. I am dealing with my husband’s constant back/disks/spine pain and it is unsettling for me–he is usually so stoic -and now I am having to do way more then I usually do ...

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I Need to Lighten Up

face to the sunshine

After the latest crisis I was just sitting here, trying to catch my breath. My mind started meandering. When did our life become so complicated? My husband has had several chronic diseases for almost two decades, most of which were not too bad the first fifteen years. I start thinking back. When did everything change? June 2012 was the spinal chord disease and subsequent surgery and paralysis. Yes, this was the most impactful to date. ...

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Healthcare-less or the Near Discharge from Hell


For those of you who have carees (or yourself) on Medicare or a Medicare Managed Care Plan, you may have glossed over, as many of us do, and not taken note of a document you receive at the time of admission to the hospital. The title is “An Important Message From Medicare About Your Rights.” Ask for a copy of this. Keep it with you for the duration of the stay. I passed over this ...

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A Bump in the Road


My husband was discharged from his latest hospital stay last Saturday. A week ago today he was rushed to the local hospital by ambulance in the wee hours of the morning. He was in pain and projectile vomiting. (And when I say projectile, I mean projectile. I was cleaning up vomit so far away from the “scene of the crime” I couldn’t believe it.) Not surprisingly the local hospital couldn’t figure out what was wrong ...

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Two Mothers


(Editor’s Note: We welcome Willem, who cares for his wife, to our blogging team today. You can connect with Willem on his profile page: @willemor.) Mother’s Day is today. Our relatonships with our mothers are supposed to be complicated. We depended on them, but we needed them to set us free. “How is your relationship with your mother?” keeps thousands of therapists gainfully employed. In my journey, my relationship with my mother and with the mother ...

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During a recent visit to our son and his wife in Utah, our daughter-in-law was in a local production of “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.” This musical has tunes which get easily onto a hamster wheel loop in one’s brain, and the song “Teamwork” was no exception. “Teamwork can make a dream work, can make your dreams come true …”  (See youtube link here at your own risk of not being able to get rid of the ...

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Who Am I?


The other day Dean, my husband, made the statement that he keeps thinking I’m his mother. He’s made this poignant statement a few times in the past couple of years and I’m always left speechless. I don’t know how to respond to his revelation, because of the emotions it brings to me. He expresses it as an eerie confessional, and I should respond with something supportive or even sweet and romantic, such as “That’s alright, ...

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Nowhere to Run; Nowhere to Hide


Right now, this moment I am overcome with sadness. Not usually in my wheelhouse. Yes, just like all of you; most days I am exhausted both mentally and physically. But this feeling today it’s a sense of dread. It’s been nearly two months since my husband’s last hospitalization for sepsis. He still is on antibiotics. He’s just not been right. Just prior he had finally settled into dialysis and came home hungry and not so ...

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Rest in Peace


When my dad passed in December 21 2007, we had a memorial service one week later. All six grandchildren came (they were on college break at the time). They all flew in, they all got there. They even sang “In The Garden” for my dad, as he had wanted. When all the grandchildren were together, which was rare, my dad would have them sing together and then say with a twinkle in his eye, “Remember, ...

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