Caring for Parents

  • Kev posted an update in the group Group logo of Caring for ParentsCaring for Parents 3 weeks, 1 day ago

    I don’t know where to begin I have been living with my mom all my life. So caregiving was not new to me but what was 2 years ago was when it became clear that getting up and walking was difficult then the “fall” happened and everything changed not only was I now responsible for meals and cleaning but bathing and toileting. I feel I have failed on…[Read more]

    • Hi Kev! Welcome! I’m glad you’re here. :) I hope you can join our daily chats–it’s a nice place to talk with others who understand. Our chat schedule is here:

      I believe anything and everything is possible. Create the schedule and then do your best to stick with it. Tweak it and adjust as needed. Feel free…[Read more]

    • Hello Kev – You sound like a marvellous son to be taking care of your mother so well! I am sure that you can try to do whatever you think will be of benefit to her – you can only try surely? I highly admire you for your care and dedication to your Mom as a whole lot of children in this day and age simply take off and leave……..
      Colette xoxo
      P.S…[Read more]

  • Sharon posted an update in the group Group logo of Caring for ParentsCaring for Parents 1 month ago

    Well, it is out in black and white. I wrote my brother that we need a family meeting to discuss some respite for me and what to do if something happens to me. His first response was , “Why do I have to be there, whatever you decide is fine with me”. So I wrote and said what weeks would you like to fill in for me, his response was exactly what I…[Read more]

    • I don’t know your brother Sharon, but it sounds like it doesn’t much matter what you say or do. He is not part of your picture. I’m guessing you just need to accept that and move on. Not a perfect solution, but you can’t ruin your life by trying to make him participate. As far as your Mom is concerned, you don’t have a brother, so you gotta just…[Read more]

      • Thanks, Sally. I pretty much knew what would happen and have made peace with it, but was not sure if I should even try to respond. My gut says not to respond, just let it go and know that I can now make all decisions free of him and his thoughts. Always nice to bounce off others who are in the situation.

        • Yes, definitely go forward making decisions without being concerned about his thoughts on the situation. You go girl!

    • Oh Sharon! I can relate to your feeling of pain and frustration! Been there too and worn the T-shirt as the saying goes. I have just come to the conclusion that in this life, there are the GIVERS and the TAKERS. And somehow I don’t think you can change a taker into becoming a giver. (Just my humble opinion) I am in the same boat. My daughter lives…[Read more]

  • lene posted an update in the group Group logo of Caring for ParentsCaring for Parents 1 month, 1 week ago

    I am very new to this blog. I guess I just need some cudo’s. My mother is very mean, doesn’t have anything good to say about anyone. I have given up my home and my husband thru the week to stay with mom and care for her, while my home & Husband are at home alone. Mom is not appreciative of anything I do. We end up sitting in the living room…[Read more]

    • I’m so sorry that your mother is not appreciative of all that you do for her. I can completely understand why you prefer to focus on tasks rather than communication. I hope that your siblings “back your play” when they come to visit. It’s hard to be the lone one on the front lines without support from family members.

    • I’m new to this site – to any caregiver support – and could really use some encouragement and companionship as I navigate the day to day of my shared life with my wonderful almost 93 year old Mom. Gotta say that I’m maxed tonight and tired and some guilty and mixed and sad, while I’m aware of the gift this season of life is for us both.

      • Welcome! We totally understand. We get the joys and the sadness and how the guilt gets mixed in. I hope you can join our chats. We’d love to have you join us. :)

    • Welcome to the site! Believe me, everyone here understands exactly what you are going through. You have come to the right place for encouragement and companionship. :)

  • Sherrie posted an update in the group Group logo of Caring for ParentsCaring for Parents 2 months ago

    Hello all – I’m new to and care giving in general. We just found out my Mom likely has advanced cancer and I’m the closest child. The last week has been a whirlwind! I feel like I’ve been plucked out of Mayberry and tossed on the Stock Exchange floor. But instead of winning or losing it’s a matter of life and death. So…[Read more]

    • We’re here to help. When you can, tell us more about your situation, including your mother’s treatment plan, how she’s feeling and where your siblings fit into the picture. I know all too well how overwhelming the cancer diagnosis of a loved one can be (and that’s without the husband-left-me part) so I really feel for you. I think you will…[Read more]

    • Sherrie, I am so glad you found us here! Just let us know what you have questions about or struggling with or whatever… it’s a safe place to say anything. Looking forward to hearing more! Join us in the chat room if/when you feel like talking. I live with my Grandma to take care of her at the age of almost 95. My Dad lives close by and has been…[Read more]

    • Sherrie – I’m so sorry to read that you now face caring for your mother after his cancer diagnosis and now to also have to face all those painful feelings of seeing your husband leaving when this is the time that you could have used his love and support. That’s a major OUCH! I’m sorry I just have no idea how to tell you that “it will all be okay”…[Read more]

  • MimbyNYC posted an update in the group Group logo of Caring for ParentsCaring for Parents 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    OMG! Jen and I just learned that her father has to have open heart surgery in the next two weeks! We’re still recovering from my Aunt Mimi’s death last month. There is some good news–I have a court date to petition to become Mimi’s son’s guardian–August 10th. Jeez.

  • Mary posted an update in the group Group logo of Caring for ParentsCaring for Parents 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    We had a lovely get-together for Mom. She loved her cake, her presents, and most of all the hugs and smiles of us and the grandchildren. We all sang and laughed a lot. At the end when she was getting tired, she asked where Dad was. I smoothely assured her he was “taking a nap” and that I would let him know where everyone was. That was all that was…[Read more]

  • Mary posted an update in the group Group logo of Caring for ParentsCaring for Parents 2 months, 3 weeks ago

    Saturday is Mom’s birthday. There will be cake and all three daughters plus some grownup grandchildren. Hoping it is a good day for her. Despite Alz she has not forgotten Dad and misses him so.

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