Tell Us: How Do Keep Your Caree Occupied?

Yesterday, during Table Talk on Your Caregiving Journey, Kristin spoke about her inability to do what she enjoys. She has books to read, words to write, websites to visit… And, yet she can’t. The stress of worrying about Mary and whether Mary is safe becomes her day’s only action. It’s all she can do—think about making sure Mary is okay. The dread of what could happen (Mary wanders...

Home Modifications for Easier Caregiving

(We welcome a guest post today from Michelle Seitzer of 101Mobility.com.) Before caregiving, when you shopped for a house, you probably had certain must-have items on your buying check-list, items like granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, shiny wood floors and custom tiling. After caregiving enters a house, you realize how hard a house, with its multiple levels, tight hallways and awkward bathrooms, can...

Your Tips: Your House of Worship and Your Caree

This morning, Claire Day, Vice President of Constituent Services for the Alzheimer’s Association Delaware Valley Chapter, joined me for our monthly discussion about dementia care. We spoke about how to keep your caree’s spirituality alive—in your house worship and at home. You can listen to our show via the player below. Claire and I shared thoughts about the importance of involving your caree in...

Preventing Delirium in Your Hospitalized Caree

Chances are, during one of your caree’s hospitalizations, you noticed that your caree experienced a significant level of confusion. The sudden change in your caree’s mental status during a hospitalization can be startling, upsetting and scary. Unfortunately, the sudden confusion, known as delirium, among the hospitalized elderly is an awful side effect of an inpatient stay. Your caree is hospitalized...

What’s Your Best Bathing Tip?

Tammy, one of our Facebook fans, would love your advice. She writes: I simply cannot get my mom to take a bath, or shower, or even a sponge bath. Got any ideas? I think she feels unsteady on the bath bench. Maybe she doesn’t like water dripping down her body or on her face while I try wash her hair, even with waterless shampoo. What suggestions can you offer Tammy? What works for you? Please share in our...

Because of Caregiving, Have You Gained Compassion?

I’ve so enjoyed speaking with Kristin, who cares for her family friend, Mary on Your Caregiving Journey. You can listen to our most recent conversation via the player at the bottom of this post. Over three shows, we’ve talked about how Kristin has gained compassion in caring for Mary, a person who is incapable of feeling compassion. Kristin describes compassion as an action and a feeling and believes...

Websites You Recommend

In our 2011 Family Caregiver Survey, we asked: Which websites do you recommend to other family caregivers? We’re happy to share the list with you today (and thanks to all who recommend Caregiving.com!!). And, please feel free to add other favorites in our comments section, below. Dementia Holly Eburne: www.hollyeburne.com/ Lewy Body Dementia Association: www.lbda.org Alzheimer Spouse:...

Tips for Communicating with Dementia

On Tuesday morning, I attended a terrific presentation by Dan Kuhn, author of The Art of Dementia Care and Alzheimer’s Early Stages: First Steps for Family, Friends and Caregivers. Dan offered tips to use when communicating with an individual with dementia or Alzheimer’s. He offered a perspective on what it’s like for a caree with dementia: Imagine, Dan said, you are traveling to a foreign country...

Lee Woodruff Answers Your Questions about Pain

(Editor’s Note: Recently, Partners Against Pain®, a national pain management education program, contacted me to suggest that its partner, Lee Woodruff, answer your questions about pain. Lee is a NY Times best-selling author and caregiver to her husband, Bob Woodruff, the ABC News anchor critically injured in Iraq in 2006. I put a call out for your questions and then submitted them, plus a few of my own....

Evaluating the Caregiving State of Affairs

(Editor’s Note: Today’s guest post comes from SeniorsforLiving.com’s Michelle Seitzer. Before committing to life as a full-time freelance writer, Michelle spent 10 years in the senior living and advocacy world, serving in various roles at assisted living communities throughout Pennsylvania and Maryland, and leading the charge for Alzheimer’s as a public policy coordinator for the Pennsylvania chapters...

Ugh! A Diagnosis. Now, What?

G-J’s news last night got me thinking. About six years ago, my dad was diagnosed with bladder cancer. We knew something was wrong prior to the diagnosis. He and my mom returned home early from a vacation because of blood in my dad’s urine. My dad loves to travel and loves to vacation. But, he was desperate to get home. That’s when we knew he knew something was really wrong. My dad had tests. Then...

How Do You Manage Bad Weather?

I’m in Chicago, which today is in the path of a bad weather system covering 2,100 miles. Our blizzard warning goes into effect today at 3 p.m. and will last 24 hours. In normal situations, bad weather becomes an inconvenience. Add in the life storm of caregiving and bad weather can be an incredible challenge. Perhaps you care for your spouse and your aging parent, who lives alone; how do you ensure both have...

Get Rid of the Bad Hands

I was watching the The Millionaire Matchmaker the other night. (I watch bad TV.) In this particular episode, the matchmaker worked with a poker player (a woman) looking for love. We followed the poker player on a date with a nice man, who asked her: What’s the trick to being a successful poker player? Quickly get rid of a bad hand,  she said. Bingo, I thought. That’s not just a poker player’s...

A Tip for a Tough Day: Appoint a Love Substitute

We finished our October class, Making Well for Wellness, on Tuesday. It’s a terrific four-part class that you can take as a self-study course (you go at your own pace and at your convenience; you also keep the materials forever so they become a go-to resource). You can register for the class here. Our class delved deeper into the traits of well-being we discussed in last month’s free webinar, Turning...

Be a Leader in Your Caregiving Role

Last May, Ellen Rogin, our wealthness expert, shared tips to help us be a leader with our money. I love this idea of taking the lead in aspects of life. Why not look at ways you can be a leader in your caregiving role? Here goes: L: Let go. Let go of what went wrong yesterday. Let go of what you can’t control. Let go of the “shoulds” (what you should do, say; what others should do, say). Hold onto...

Feeling Fear? It’s Natural

I attended a meeting on Monday night about “unfear” led by Karlin Sloan. Karlin, a CEO, author and speaker, spoke about moving from fear as it relates to organizations and leaders. You’re a leader, too, because of your caregiving role. During her presentation, Karlin shared an interesting insight: When we experience change, we automatically experience fear. Have you been wondering why, as your...

Use Your Day’s Last Five Minutes to Jumpstart Tomorrow

I flipped channels last night until I flipped to Wayne Dyer on PBS. You probably see Dr. Dyer on your local PBS station during a pledge drive. He tapes a lecture that PBS broadcasts then sells his tapes and books at break as a way to make money for your local PBS station. Dr. Dyer is a self-help guru who focuses on the power of your thought. I like to watch him because he’s very calm. And, he seems to know...

Coping When You Have a Job (Like Caregiving) That Causes You to Feel Less Than You

At some point in our lives, we’ll have jobs that we take that are less than what we can do. We take them out of economic need or because of convenience or simply because it’s what we can find. We complete menial tasks or report to insensitive and overbearing managers or sit near uncooperative co-workers. Sounds kinda like caregiving, doesn’t it? So, when caregiving feels like it’s less than...

ESP

ESP usually means “extrasensory perception.” Today, it means: Execute a Special Plan. When you look around and think, “I’m out of options. I can’t find another choice,” use your ESP. When you want to sit and cry because nothing seems to work, use your ESP. When you want to run and hide because it seems so much bigger than you, use your ESP. Your ESP contains ideas, suggestions,...

How… Will You Be Stronger?

We often talk about a shortcoming that we want to improve or change. We may feel impatient, so work to gain more patience. We may feel we rush too much through our day, so want to slow down. We may feel we are quick to criticize, so commit to focusing on holding our tongue. Certainly, we can gain by working on our weaknesses. What if, though, we looked at our strengths and said: This is working really well for me....

Quick Tip: Have a Bag Ready for Hospitalization

A family caregiver shared this tip with me several years ago; it’s so good I never forgot it. The family caregiver kept a bag packed with toiletries and change of clothes ready to go in case her caree was suddenly hospitalized. This way, she arrived at the hospital with her bag, ready to stay as long as needed. She could, if necessary, easily settle in to her caree’s hospital room to ensure proper...

“Either…Or” Can Become “And”

In caregiving, the world can seem to consist of “either…or.” The world, then, might become these thoughts: Either I put my needs second or my caree doesn’t have his needs met. Either I stay with my caree constantly or bad things will happen. Either I put my life on hold or my caree will not have what he needs when he needs it. Thinking these statements is much different than reading them. When you...