The stress has taken over her days. The stress has become her life.

I think you can all relate. It’s what makes stress so insidious—it will grip your mind and soul with such a tight hold that it leaves little room for anything else. And, in caregiving, the cures for the stress, like getting more help (sometimes, you can’t get enough) or having Mary attend a local adult day center (there isn’t one nearby) can be an impossibility. It would be great if Mary could take a walk to tire herself out so she sleeps better. But Kristin lives in a remote area, in the mountains, which makes it hard for her and Mary to go out for a walk together. And, it’s long drive into town; a shopping mall for safe walking during the winter isn’t an option.

So, how do you keep Mary occupied long enough so that Kristin can take a break? It’s a caregiver’s conundrum.

We’ve put together a few ideas to increase a caree’s activity (to help promote a better sleep) and/or keep a caree occupied (so you can take a break):

Buck and Buck: The company makes dressing easier. It also makes undressing difficult—which comes in handy if you’d like to keep your caree either clean or simply clothed (or both). For instances, back-zip jumpsuits ensure a caree can’t slip out of clothes or reach into what you don’t want them to reach. Shop here.

Collector’s Choice Music: Purchase your caree’s favorite music, including Big Band, classical/opera and soundtracks. Also available are old radio shows. Visit www.ccmusic.com or call 800-993-6344.

Innovative Caregiving Resources: Researchers from the Gerontology Center at the University of Utah concluded that video respites work—and developed their own series as result. The videos are now available through an unrelated company, Innovative Caregiving Resources. Videos cater to a wide range of care recipients; in “Ladies…Let’s Chat” female carees will enjoy a visit with Diane and her  grandchildren and in “Lunchbreak with Tony” male carees take a lunch break and discuss first cars and stick ball.  Other videos are geared toward specific ethnicities (Hispanic, African Americans, Jewish) and toward holidays, such as Christmas. For more information, visit www.videorespite.com or call 1-800-249-5600 .

NASCO: Its online catalog, at www.enasco.com/senioractivities, features products to captivate your caree. You’ll products for persons with Alzheimer’s, as well as puzzles, games, sing-a-long videos and arts and crafts. You’ll want to peruse this company’s catalog and/or web site; it offers great ideas on how to keep you caree occupied with meaningful activites. Call for catalog: 800-558-9595.

Alzheimer’s Store: You’ll find products that keep your caree. Products are categorized by stages (Early Stage, Middle Stage and Later Stage), wandering, safety, forgetfullness. Visit www.alzstore.com or call 800-752-3238.

Puzzles and Games: You can find puzzles specifically for persons with dementia. Check out Memory Jogging Puzzles, MGC Puzzles, DignifieDesigns and Springbook Puzzles. You also can find more game ideas at Marbles the Brain Store; if you’re unsure of which game would be appropriate for your caree, call (877) 527-2460 to speak with a Marbles’ “brain coach” who can offer suggestions.

Sit and Be Fit: Sit and Be Fit is a line of exercise videos developed and lead by Mary Ann Wilson, who you’ve probably seen on your local PBS station. Mary Ann has tapes for persons with chronic illnesses, such as arthritis and Parkinson’s, as well as tapes for persons new to an exercise program. “The Caregiver’s Guide To Exercise Video” is perfect for carees who are wheelchair and bed-bound. Call 509-448-9438 to learn about the right exercise video for you and your caree. Or visit the Sit and Be Fit web site at www.sitandbefit.com.

Senior Yoga: In this DVD, yoga teacher Debbie Russo leads you through a series of chair poses to help you and your caree increase your strength, endurance and flexibility. You’ll enjoy improved balance and stress relief. Learn more here.

No-cost activity ideas include folding laundry, organizing recipes and looking through old photos. Your caree also may be able to complete simple household tasks, like water the plants or help with cooking or baking or help feed and groom the pets. You also can reminisce, asking questions about a caree’s past, and play a favorite DVD of a treasured event (like a family member’s wedding). You also can ask family and friends to regularly call and write letters or send cards.

I’d love to add your suggestions as well. In our comments section, please tell us: How do you keep your caree occupied?

Reminders: Our next talk show airs on Tuesday, January 10, at 7:30 p.m. ET. And, I have our question (inspired by our show with Kristin): How can our communities help prevent family caregiver burn-out? Call in and share your suggestions; first caller wins. You can listen here. And, we chat on Twitter tonight (January at 8 p.m. ET (7 p.m. CT, 5 p.m. PT) about your best caregiving tips. To join us, just go to tweetchat.com, sign in with your Twitter credentials and use our hashtag: carechat. Finally, be sure to sign up for one of our classes; you’ll be amazed at what you learn about yourself!

Related Articles

• Encouraging Kristin (caregiving.com)
• Alzheimer’s and Hospice (caregiving.com)
• *This* Is My Life (caregiving.com)
• Your Caree Declines, Your Health Care Costs Increase (caregiving.com)
• To Kristin’s We Went (caregiving.com)
• In Six Words, What’s Your Unexpected Benefit? (caregiving.com)
• What Do You Know About Caregiving That the World Doesn’t? (caregiving.com)
• A Tip for a Tough Day: Appoint a Love Substitute (caregiving.com)

Before caregiving, when you shopped for a house, you probably had certain must-have items on your buying check-list, items like granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, shiny wood floors and custom tiling.

After caregiving enters a house, you realize how hard a house, with its multiple levels, tight hallways and awkward bathrooms, can make the experience. Now, your wish list for a house probably includes wide doorways and expanded halls, hand and chair rails, interior and exterior ramps, and a streamlined one-level living quarter.

Maybe you can’t move, but you can look to solutions to help. Whether you renovate an entire floor of your home, build an addition (i.e. the mother-in-law suite) or complete several home modifications in stages, it is possible to age in place (AIP) without moving. Consider these tips for adapting your home – and know that the benefits extend beyond the caree to the family caregiver, too:

1. Simplify, simplify, simplify: Decluttering, streamlining, and organizing the home is one of the easiest (and most affordable) ways to make it AIP-friendly. Those boxes of old magazines, that dining room table piled with paperwork, the hall closet that’s inaccessible because it’s bursting with rarely-used clothes and holiday decorations – we all have them. But overstuffed shelves, drawers and cabinets are not only unattractive, they’re a fall risk, a hazard, an obstacle to efficiency. It doesn’t have to be spring to do some much need cleaning and consolidating. And if your caree requires a transition to a care facility, the work of downsizing from a multi-bedroom home to a single room or apartment will be easier.

2. Ramp it up: Installing ramps at the home’s most-used exits and entrances enhances independence and prevents home “imprisonment”. Additionally, stair lifts allow access to a second floor bathroom or bedroom. These aids also ease the physical burden and stress on a family caregiver’s body if the caree requires mobility assistance within the home.

3. Let there be light: Lighting can make a significant difference when it comes to preventing falls and easing mobility in the home. Certain lighting fixtures (floor lamps, for example) can be dangerous if they have long wires exposed and in the walking (tripping) path. Installing additional lights (or windows to let in more natural light) in high-traffic areas and frequently-used rooms makes the home safer – and more attractive.

4. Watch where you step: You walk all over it every day but probably don’t give it much thought until your balance or gait is compromised. Flooring in all rooms of the house can easily present a fall risk as can rugs that are bulky, shift around easily, or have corners that catch on walkers, canes or wheelchairs. Hard flooring provides optimal mobility.

5. Keep things dry in the water closet: In the bathroom, where the majority of fall-related injuries occur, implement non-skid surfaces. Make sure all surfaces (counters, tubs/shower floors, etc.) stay dry.

6. Lend a hand: Chair rails in hallways, grab bars in the bathroom, and other touch points for safe and supported maneuvering can dramatically reduce the risk of falls and promote independence within the home.

An added bonus? After home modifications have been made to accommodate an aging resident, these features, if done well, can certainly be a selling point for future homebuyers (i.e. those young adults who are already thinking about taking care of Mom, Grandpa, or another senior relative). Invest wisely; prepare your home now.

(You can find more information on AIP adaptations at 101Mobility.com.)

Michelle Seitzer is a freelance writer and editor who specializes in elder care content. Seitzer writes for a number of senior-related websites, including 101 Mobility.com, the nation’s leading sales, service and installation provider of a complete line of mobility and accessibility products and equipment that may be customized to suit each individuals’ home care needs.  Learn more about the company at http://101mobility.com/ or email Michelle (mseitzer@101mobility.com).

Claire and I shared thoughts about the importance of involving your caree in worship services (assuming your caree worships) for as long as possible. I’d love to know: What tips work for you and caree at worship services? How do you make the time in your house of worship successful for you and your caree? Although our conversation focused on carees with dementia, please share tips that can work for any family caregiver and caree, regardless of the diagnosis.

Please share your ideas and solutions in our comments section, below.

Related Articles

• Tips for Dementia Care (caregiving.com)
• Tell Us: What’s the Smartest Thing You’ve Done? (caregiving.com)
• Answers to Your Questions about Dementia Care (caregiving.com)
• Alzheimer’s and Hospice (caregiving.com)
• Talking with G-J (caregiving.com)
• I’m Enough, So I’ve Had Enough (of the Doritos) (caregiving.com)
• Your Caree Declines, Your Health Care Costs Increase (caregiving.com)

Unfortunately, the sudden confusion, known as delirium, among the hospitalized elderly is an awful side effect of an inpatient stay. Your caree is hospitalized for one reason but, because of the hospitalization, becomes worse.

On Friday, The New York Times New Old Age Blog featured a program that helps those hospitalized elderly suffering from delirium. (You’ll want to bookmark the article, Preventing Hospital Delirium, because you’ll find the tips to be incredibly helpful). The Hospital Elder Life Program (HELP), developed by Dr. Sharon K. Inouye and colleagues at the Yale University School of Medicine, has been adopted by more than 200 hospitals. According to the HELP website, two million older Americans this year will develop delirium and functional decline during a hospitalization.

The HELP program offers tips for clinicians to help prevent delirium in hospitalized older adults, including meeting the patients’ needs for nutrition, fluids, and sleep as well as keeping them as mobile as possible. The website also offers tips for family caregivers to help prevent delirium in their hospitalized caree. You can read the tips here.

What’s been your experience with delirium in your hospitalized caree? Please share your stories and tips on how to cope in our comments section, below.

Related Articles

• I’m Ready. Will You Help Me? (caregiving.com)
• Quick Tip: Have a Bag Ready for Hospitalization (caregiving.com)
• Suggestions to Help a Caree’s Hospital Confusion (caregiving.com)
• Updated Discharge Planning Guide Available (caregiving.com)
• Hospital Helps (caregiving.com)
• Booklet Helps Ease the Stress of Hospitalization for Persons with Memory Loss (caregiving.com)

I simply cannot get my mom to take a bath, or shower, or even a sponge bath. Got any ideas? I think she feels unsteady on the bath bench. Maybe she doesn’t like water dripping down her body or on her face while I try wash her hair, even with waterless shampoo.

What suggestions can you offer Tammy? What works for you? Please share in our comments section, below.

Resources

• Do you have a conundrum for our community? You can ask for solutions and suggestions from our community of family caregivers. Submit your question here.
• Be sure to share your answer to this question, What do you know about dementia that the world doesn’t?, tomorrow (September 20) during our live call-in talk show. Our show airs at 7:30 p.m. ET. Learn more here.

Related Articles

• Tell Us: When Does Caregiving Steal Your Spirit? (caregiving.com)
• In Six Words, What’s Your Simple Caregiving Tip? (caregiving.com)
• Cooking for Caregiving – Talking with Ellie Krieger (caregiving.com)
• How Do You Manage Caregiving and Your Career? (caregiving.com)

Over three shows, we’ve talked about how Kristin has gained compassion in caring for Mary, a person who is incapable of feeling compassion. Kristin describes compassion as an action and a feeling and believes her ability to feel and act with compassion toward Mary has improved her ability to care for Mary. For instance, Kristin now focuses on the task at hand, with goals in hand: She approaches personal care with humor, in order to get Mary to smile. Once she has a smile, she begins the task. If Mary becomes uncooperative during the task, Kristin commits to meeting Mary’s loud voice with a lower one. This approach has made a huge difference for both of them. (You can listen to all three of our discussions here.)

So, I wonder: Has caregiving made you more compassionate? If it has, what’s been the impact of other relationships in your life. Please share your thoughts in our comments section, below.

(Program Note: Two shows air tomorrow: Ellen Rogin, our wealthness expert, joins me at 11:30 a.m. CT (12:30 p.m. ET) and Dr. Elizabeth Lombardo, our happiness expert, talks about how happiness affects our chronic pain at 1 p.m. CT (2 p.m. ET). Listen (and download the podcasts) here.)

Related Articles

• Table Talk: Trish (caregiving.com)
• Does Sharing Make You a Better Caregiver? (caregiving.com)
• How Have You Grown Because of Caregiving? (caregiving.com)
• Your Value: $450 Billion (caregiving.com)
• In Six Words, What’s Your Simple Caregiving Tip? (caregiving.com)

We’re happy to share the list with you today (and thanks to all who recommend Caregiving.com!!). And, please feel free to add other favorites in our comments section, below.

Dementia

• Holly Eburne: www.hollyeburne.com/
• Lewy Body Dementia Association: www.lbda.org
• Alzheimer Spouse: www.thealzheimerspouse.com/
• Moving Forward with Alzheimer’s: www.movingforwardwithalzheimers.blogspot.com/
• Alzheimer’s Reading Room: www.alzheimersreadingroom.com/
• The Alzheimer’s Association: www.alz.org
• Memory People: www.facebook.com/groups/180666768616259
• Frontal Temporal Dementia: www.ftdsupportforum.com

Caregiving Organizations

• Well Spouse Association: www.wellspouse.org
• National Family Caregivers Association: www.nfcacares.org
• National Alliance for Caregiving: www.caregiving.org/

Caregiving Websites

• Caregiver.com
• Caring.com
• Robert’s Sister: www.robertssister.com

Medical Information, Additional Support

• Kaiser Health on the Hill podcast: http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/health-on-the-hill/id205420589
• AARP: www.aarp.com
• Stroke Network: www.strokenetwork.org/
• WebMD: www.webmd.com
• CareCentral: www.carecentral.com
• Health Central: www.healthcentral.com

Related Articles

• In Six Words, What’s Your Simple Caregiving Tip? (caregiving.com)
• Research Opportunity for Family Caregivers of Persons with Dementia (caregiving.com)
• Call for Nominations: National Family Caregiver of the Year (caregiving.com)
• Tips for Communicating with Dementia (caregiving.com)
• Table Talk: Trish (caregiving.com)
• Exemplary Programs that Support, Educate Family Caregivers Honored (caregiving.com)
• A Life Line: By Then, I’ll Be Too Old (caregiving.com)

He offered a perspective on what it’s like for a caree with dementia: Imagine, Dan said, you are traveling to a foreign country and don’t speak the language. Or, have moved to the United States from another country and don’t speak English. Or, you arrive at a party that a friend invited you to, but your friend is a no-show and you don’t know anyone.

This perspective helps us understand the feelings of a caree with dementia, the feelings of fear, uncertainty, insecurity. The disease transports a caree into another land where they don’t speak the language. How awful is that.

To help us speak a caree’s language, Dan reminded us that only 7% of communication comes from our words. It’s our our voice and our body language that accounts for the bulk of communication. You can see why it’s so important to do your best to stay calm. When we’re stressed, we communicate that. When we’re calm, we communicate that.

To make communication easier, Dan suggests:

• Eliminating background noise
• Making eye contact
• Using your caree’s preferred name (perhaps your caree no longer answers to “Mon” but to “Phyllis”)
• Using touch and body language

When communicating, Dan shared these suggestions:

• Remember the 4 S’s: Smile, short, simple and show
• Use repetition
• Narrow down choices
• Break down steps
• Allow plenty of time for tasks to be completed; don’t outpace
• Allow plenty of time for your caree to respond to you
• Respond to your caree’s emotional tone
• Connect by whatever means necessary (movement, singing, praying, art, story-telling, dancing)

A few of my tips follow:

• If your caree is upset or sad, ask: What’s upsetting you? What’s making you sad? (As the disease progresses, these questions may not be appropriate.) We may think we know, but we never really know until we ask.
• Understand what helps your caree feel safe in his or her environment. Then, use these safety measures to help your caree feel comforted. (You can learn more about this tip in my comment on Bette’s post here.)
• Let go of the right way (of doing something, of describing something, of saying something) for both yourself and your caree. It’s right if it brings the desired results or if it brings comfort and meaning to your caree.

What tips can you add? What works for you? Please share in our comments section, below.

Resources

• Talking to Alzheimer’s: Simple Ways to Connect When You Visit with a Family Member or Friend by Claudia Strauss.

Reminders

• Your Caregiving Journey airs tomorrow at 9 a.m. CT (10 a.m. ET, 7 a.m. PT). Kristin joins me for Table Talk. Listen to the live show (or download the podcast for later listening) here.
• What’s caregiving like for you? Share in our annual family caregiver survey, which closes tomorrow. Share here.
• Take a class in our Caregiving Summer School! We’ve got a class to help you start Mondays with a quiet and calm heart; to help you learn the meaning behind your journey; and to help you start your journal. Each class costs $27; Denise leads the class. Register here.
• Submit your story about “help” (however you define it) for our upcoming book. Deadline is July 1. You’ll find details here.

Related Articles

• A Tool to Measure Pain in Persons with Dementia (caregiving.com)
• Still Missing Her (caregiving.com)
• Alzheimer’s Diagnostic Guidelines Updated (caregiving.com)
• Taking the Follow (caregiving.com)
• Exemplary Programs that Support, Educate Family Caregivers Honored (caregiving.com)
• Nose to Nose Creates Deeper Relationships (caregiving.com)
• Lee Woodruff Answers Your Questions about Pain (caregiving.com)

Lee Woodruff

(Editor’s Note: Recently, Partners Against Pain®, a national pain management education program, contacted me to suggest that its partner, Lee Woodruff, answer your questions about pain. Lee is a NY Times best-selling author and caregiver to her husband, Bob Woodruff, the ABC News anchor critically injured in Iraq in 2006. I put a call out for your questions and then submitted them, plus a few of my own. Our questions and Lee’s answers follow.)

Caregiving.com: What causes pain? And, why is it so hard to manage?
Lee: Pain can be caused by many things, and it is sometimes hard to pinpoint exactly what has caused someone to experience pain. In fact, there are hundreds of syndromes or disorders that are associated with pain. There are two types of pain: acute, which often comes on suddenly and is generally due to injury or disease; and chronic, which usually lasts for several months or longer.¹

I have first-hand experience caring for a loved one with chronic pain. While on assignment in Iraq, my husband, ABC News anchor Bob Woodruff, was hit by a roadside bomb, and almost lost his life. What followed was months of recovery and hard work, accompanied by chronic pain—so intense that even sneezing hurt tremendously. We were extremely fortunate, and Bob recovered and is now back on the job, but it made me aware of how important managing a loved one’s pain is.

Pain is a part of the human experience that we’re still learning about, and it can be challenging to treat because everyone experiences pain differently. In addition, there is no one-size-fits-all treatment plan for pain. That’s why it’s important to seek help from a qualified healthcare provider who has experience treating pain.

Caregiving.com: How can I tell if my caree with Alzheimer’s is in pain?
Lee: My father has dementia, and while we are very fortunate that he does not experience chronic pain, I know what it’s like to care for a loved one with this condition. Dementia is a gradual chipping away of a person – it’s like watching someone being erased.

You can find great tips for assessing whether a caree with dementia is experiencing persistent pain on the educational website, Partners Against Pain (www.partnersagainstpain.com). Some things to look for include facial expressions (such as grimacing, frowning, or even blinking rapidly), mental status changes, like crying, and behavioral changes, like refusing food.² It is also important to ask the healthcare provider treating your caree to consider, assess, and treat any pain your caree may experience. For more information, please visit http://www.partnersagainstpain.com/pain-caregiver/assessment-dementia.aspx.

Caregiving.com: How do we know when our caree’s pain indicates a more serious problem?
Lee: Anytime your caree indicates that he or she is experiencing pain, it is important to seek medical attention. Sometimes the source of the pain and the extent of the problem is obvious, as in Bob’s case. There was no doubt in our minds what was causing his pain. However, in other cases the cause can be stealthier, and it’s important to seek out the assistance of a healthcare professional, who will be able to best assess your caree’s pain, its potential causes, and how best to treat it.

Caregiving.com: Are there alternatives to medications to manage pain?
Lee: Medication can be a very important part of treatment. I know that, in Bob’s case, prescription pain medicine helped enormously during his recovery. That said, many people find that an integrative approach to pain management is most effective. This means combining medication with complementary and alternative therapies like acupuncture, massage, meditation and yoga. Let your caree’s healthcare provider know that your caree is interested in using an integrative approach to pain management. And remember, your caree may have to try several different strategies before he or she finds the one that works best.

Caregiving.com: My mother has dementia. During a recent hospitalization, the nurse asked her to rate her pain from 1 to 10. Of course, she couldn’t do this. Is there another way to prompt a patient with dementia to be able to describe their pain?
Lee: If your caree has dementia, the best thing to do is to closely monitor him or her. Keep track of your caree’s eating habits, facial expressions, and body movements. Any of these can offer clues to the level of pain that your caree may be experiencing. Please visit www.partnersagainstpain.com/pain-caregiver/assessment-dementia.aspx for more information.

###

References

1. National Institutes of Health. National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke. Pain: Hope Through Research.Office of Communications and Public Liason, 3 Aug. 2009. Web. http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/chronic_pain/detail_chronic_pain.htm Accessed March 1, 2011.
2. National Family Caregivers. http://thefamilycaregiver.org/caregiving_resources/aapm.cfm. Accessed March 1, 2011.

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Resources

• Lee and Partners Against Pain® educate family caregivers through a resource they’ve created called Caregiver Cornerstones. The resource provides information, encouragement and tools to help you meet the unique challenges you face managing your caree’s pain.

Related Articles

• Tell Us: Why Does Growing Come During Hardship? (caregiving.com)
• What Are Your Questions About Managing Your Caree’s Pain? (caregiving.com)
• When Have You Suffered in Caregiving? (caregiving.com)
• Evaluating the Caregiving State of Affairs (caregiving.com)
• When Hiring Help, What’s Your Deal Breaker? (caregiving.com)

Transitions and turning points are natural parts of the caregiving landscape. Make decisions, change decisions. Devise plans, undo plans. Settle into a rhythm and the beat changes.

One of the toughest transitions? Knowing when your caree needs more services.

Family caregivers know that things will change. They understand that their caree’s health will decline. They recognize that certain treatments may help but that, at some point, treatment alone will not suffice.

But knowing and doing are two very different things. It’s one thing to recognize when your caree moves into a new phase of the disease process. It’s another to stop and say, “She needs more help.” And then it’s another thing entirely to call a professional who can provide that help.

First, there’s the guilt thing. Why can’t I provide what she needs? What if the person I hire doesn’t do things right? What if he thinks I’ve given up on him by getting help?

If your caree needs more help, it doesn’t mean you have failed. It means that the person under your care has new needs to be met, needs that may require more specialized services or more hours of care than you can provide. You can’t add more hours to the day, so you may have to add more people to the caregiving equation…and it’s okay to do so.

Then, there’s the next step thing. What help do we need?

You’ll find your answers by taking time to assess the current situation. You may want to ask other family members and friends for their input. What do they notice? What services do they think would help? Even though it may be tough to hear their suggestions, input from outside your situation may provide you with helpful perspectives.

If possible, talk with your caree about your concerns. He or she will likely notice if you’re under pressure, which may in turn influence the quality of care you provide. An honest and open conversation may make all the difference.

If your caree visits the doctor regularly, then the doctor can probably tell you whether your caree’s physical condition requires more specialized services.

How you feel during your day may be the strongest indicator that caregiving is getting the best of you. You will know when you and your caree needs more services if you feel…

• …you don’t have enough hours in the day for what needs to be done (both as a family caregiver and as a person with other responsibilities and needs of your own),
• …stressed out (i.e., you can’t sleep, you’re depressed, you lose your patience easily, you’re eating too much, etc.),
• …overwhelmed (Which meds does she get on what day? When is his next therapy appointment? Where is the cancer specialist’s office located?), or
• …exhausted, especially after a good night’s rest or a period of respite.

If you identify with even just one of the above characteristics, then it’s time to evaluate the caregiving state of affairs. You can gain a better understanding of your situation by asking yourself these questions:

• Which tasks and responsibilities feel like a struggle?
• What times during the day do you feel the greatest amount of stress?
• When do you find yourself running late, losing your temper, scrambling for a solution?
• What do you find yourself dreading or hating?
• When do you find yourself in a tug-of-war with your caree?
• What times of the day are tough for your caree?
• When during the day does your worry about your caree intensify?

Your answers to these questions will help pinpoint when and with which tasks you need more help. Then, begin brainstorming options. Solutions may be scheduling more respite or hiring a cleaning service or delegating more responsibility to your children/spouse. Look for professionals, like home care agencies, to manage the more complex and intense care needs.

Above all, remember that being at your best means you have to take care of yourself. If you’re not factoring your needs into the equation, things will eventually fall apart.

Living in the moment with a spirit of flexibility is crucial to successful caregiving. Easier said than done, right? Of course – but there is great freedom in flexibility. Letting go means accepting what is to come without putting the entire burden on your own shoulders, a weight that even the strongest person cannot manage forever.

How did you know when you and your caree needed more help? What additional help did you get? Please share your thoughts in our comments section, below.

Visit SeniorsforLiving.com to find out about home care options that may provide some assistance to you.

Resources

You’ll learns lots of great coping strategies by listening to our monthly free webinars, all archived here.

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• National Kidney Foundation Needs Family Caregivers for a Survey (caregiving.com)
• Family Caregivers Want Help from Web-Based and Mobile Technologies (caregiving.com)