It can be very frustrating, upsetting, overwhelming… It can be awful!
But, it’s even more awful when you’re all alone. Our online support groups offer comfort during difficult times and celebrations during those special moments. We offer 14 groups so that you connect with others in a situation similar to yours. Feel free to join as any groups as you’d like.
Our groups are open to all members of Caregiving.com; to join us, go here. Joining is free and easy.
Are you already a member of Caregiving.com? Go here to join our groups.
If you have any problems, please e-mail Denise; she’ll be glad to help.
You are a disruptor. The delivery of health care starts with you, continues because of you, and ends with you. Let's disrupt together to make the world better for family caregivers. 
Pam
I am looking for a support group for parents taking care of disabled (mental retardation) young adults. My daughter is 23. It seems like there are either groups for parents of young children or caregivers of elderly parents. What about worn-out parents of older “kids”? Thanks for any help you can provide.
Denise
Hi Pam–There’s a group called Caring for Adult Children; will that work? Here it is: http://www.caregiving.com/groups/caring-for-adult-children/
Dawn
It helped me for my sister. I will be passing this along. My sister is having difficulty with her congintively impaired daughter and needs solutions, help and support.
Thanks
Carol
Hello I need some help. I am at the end of my road.(Spiritually Bankrupt and financially Bankrupt) I have been caring for my parents who are chronically ill. Lost my Dad last year. My Mom is doing better it was easier when she was doing worse.(don’t know if that makes sense) I a also have a 20 year old son with disabilities. I have 5 brothers and sisters who show up maybe once and year. Some never. I feel alone like no one
understands. I am sure there are lots of people who do I just don’t know of any.
Maybe someone can tell where there is a support group for me?
Thank you,
Carol
Denise
Hi Carol–I’m so glad you found us and took the time to post a comment. You can call your local Area Agency on Aging to find out about support groups; you can search http://www.eldercare.gov/. And, please feel free to join us here: We let it out and do our best to have some fun along the way.
Cynthia Williams
I understand. I have cared for my husband for 14 years.ALONE! It has created a lot of health problems for me. I have no family except for a niece(serrogate daughter) raising two babies alone. At one point she too was a millstone around my neck until last year when I ended up in back surgery from not being able to walk. I was making plans to move to Wisconsin where my children are to get help. Then finally she stepped up to the plate, not wanting me to leave. So far she has kept her promise. On the other hand, my husband had two sisters her until 2 years ago when one moved back to Chicago. A son, and had a daughter with two children. Many nephews and nieces all in the same town. Because of their unacceptance of me no one would help, without getting compensated to care. They wanted to come in and dictate what was going on in my home. When I went to the hospital, I had to send him to the VA until I was released. If he stayed home, his daughter would half do, once I was released, when I walked in the door she walked out. Never in the 14 years did she ever offer me a glass of water . I took my hands off of her after 19 years and told my husband, that I felt I had tried long enough to be a family to her encluding taking her and her children in for 2 months free. I had to replace most things after she left, not even a I appreciate it. I told him my problem was not that she did not respect me but that he had given her everything, and she did not honor him or her mother. I reminded him that Honor of parents was the only commandment with promise for a long life. That was January. She started going to the doctor and they could never find anything wrong, On June 8th she died
I went to Wisconsin in May after recouperating from back surgery. My mother had been battling cancer so I asked her to wait until I could walk. She did. I told my brother to keep telling her I would be there for mother’s day. I firmly believe people have a check off list to finish their life before they die. Mom’s was seeing my face and the face of my sister. I got into the hospital on May 6th and my sister got there that night. We stayed at the hospital, the entire family came through, with laughter and songs, and her favorite music place under her pillow. At 10:45pm May 7th she slipped away with my stepfather gone to the house, and her three children she wanted with her there. There were no tears, we joked as she tried to slip away unnoticed.We prayed and talked to her, laughed, then notified the hospital that she was gone. As I closed my eyes in prayer for the final rites, I saw a crowd of white figures leaving the room. It was a beautiful site. We miss her and will miss her, but we have no tears of remorse.
Ruth
Hi Carol,
Yes, being alone in caregiving is very stressful. I have a good friend I call almost daily for support. I feel I have called her too often, thaat is why I am joining taregiving.com
I have gotten better at dealing with stress because I realize it will hurt my health if I don’t.
Ruth
Hi, Not sure how this works at all as I am new.
Denise
Hi Ruth–The first step is to join the site. I can help you with the next step after you join. To join the site, go here: http://www.caregiving.com/sign-up/. Looking forward to having you with us!!
JeffV
Should a 12-yo girl be allowed to care for her Grandmother who suffers from Alzheimer’s
Her Grandmother is 86 y/o and she is sometimes delusional. The little girl is a bright young lady and thinks she can handle it.
Any advice would be appreciated.
Jeff
Stacy Willson
Jeff, I am twenty one years old and I am caring for my elderly grandmother. I would never allow a twelve year old to care for their elderly parent. I thought that I could “handle” it, and for awhile I could. But it’s not fair to the child. It’s not fair at all, she should not have to bear the burden. It is difficult for adults, it is difficult for me. I could not imagine being that young and caring for my own grandmother no matter how much I loved her. Sure it is rewarding, and I’m sure she loves her grandmother very much and is willing to do whatever it takes to make sure her grandmother is happy and comfortable; but I think at such a young age she should not be burdened (burdened, may not be the correct word, or the word most people would agree with, but at twelve years old I was worried about my peers and what they thought of me and not of what I would feed my grandmother next, how she would react, or even if I were doing things as they should be done). I may be jumping from one subject to another, but having a younger sister who will be twelve next year, I believe that she should be the one who is taken care of, not the other way around. I believe that most caregivers, or hopefully most caregivers are adults; I believe that most of them would agree that caregiving is one of the most difficult situations to be put in. I also believe that children should be protected, and that a girl at age tweleve should be taken care of instead of taking care of someone, no matter how close they are. Even though she believes that she is able to care for her grandmother, I believe that she does not know the responsibility she is taking on. And the person who is looking out for her own well-being should know better.
Mimi
My sister was diagnosed with a brain tumor, benign as far as she is telling me. There has been such drastic personality changes lately & she refuses to go back to the doctor. Says she would know if anything was changed but it obviously has. Don’t know where to turn for advis to help get through to her. The family is in crisis & I can’t just sit by & lose my sister.
Denise
Hi Mimi–Thanks so much for reaching out. Can you tell us a little more about the situation? Is your sister married? Do you live near her? What’s your worst worry? And, finally, what would you like to do?
judy strano
I realized today that I am keeping myself numb, trying not feel how hard it is to care for a mom with dementia and husband who is disabled. I thought that I wanted to join a support group but sharing feelings means actually feeling them!
I read about “me time” and I feel worse that I can’t seem to find time to brush my teeth, not what is meant by “me time” I am sure.
I wish I had something to look forward to. I am an upbeat person by nature and how little patience for my own “poor me” feelings. I see that friends are kind and care but they can only hear so much about how stressed and tired I am. Fortunately, I have one pal who will be there for whatever I need. I have to force myself to call on her.
Just writing this makes me teary. Better get back to what I must do. Thanks for listening.
Judy
Gail
My Mom has dementia and I know how tired and stressed you must be, especially with your husband being disabled too. After getting shingles and almost getting it in my eyes, I realized, I had to slow down. Call your friend and start getting away from the situation as often as you can.
Nicole
I started caring for my grandmother who has Alzheimers 4 1/2 years ago. I am now 26 years old. I don’t think being “bright” has anything to do with it. I think having knowledge of the disease and also extreme amounts of patience is key. Also, I don’t think any child should have to deal with this kind of stress unless she is already living with her grandmother and is used to it? It can be incredibly depressing to care for someone with Alzheimer’s. I have personally experienced extreme anxiety and depression caring for my grandma.
Denise
Hi Nicole–Thanks so much for sharing your story. I wonder: Who has been most helpful and supportive for you in your role? I would imagine friends do their best to understand but don’t really realize how stressful and difficult this is.
June
Can you connect me with a caregiver support group and a personal therapist who specializes in working with caregivers in Kane County/St Charles IL area? I have been sole caregiver for my elderly parents for over 15 years. I have blue cross HMO. Thank you kindly.
Denise
Hi June–Call the Area Agency on Aging in your area; here’s the contact information:
Northeastern Illinois Area on Aging
245 W. Roosevelt Road – Building 6, Suites 41-43
West Chicago, Illinois 60185
630-293-5990
Fax: 630-293-7488
E-mail: info@ageguide.org
To find a counselor, my best suggestion would be to check with Blue Cross for a list of providers in your area. I also coach family caregivers; coaching takes place over the phone. Insurance does not cover the costs of coaching, but you do receive a complementary session with me. The free session often can help point you in the right direction. If you’d like to schedule a session; just send me an email: denise@caregiving.com.
Ailana
How do you request to be a member in the support groups?
Denise
Hi Ailana, To join our support groups, just join our site. Go here: http://www.caregiving.com/sign-up/ for details on how to join. If you have any questions, just let me know. We look forward to getting to know you!
Brenda
I have been caring for my husband with stage 4 kidney cancer for almost 2 years. There are times when I want to put a ad in the local newspaper or on our local tv news that “Cancer Is Not Contagious!” We have learned that this is a journey that we often feel isolated and alone. I encourage friends and family to call and talk with my husband because he is homebound and the call would brighten his day, but these calls do not happen as often as needed. He has worked in our town for over 50 years and has mentored and made many friendships. It is through this cancer journey that we have learned who the few true friends are. We are always encouraged by the fact that our LORD is always with us and carrying us in the palms of his hands.
Has anyone else experienced this same isolation from others? I can see it really bothers my husband.
Trish
Brenda, I am sorry for the isoloation you and your husband are experiencing. There are so many reasons why people back off from those they know once there is a cancer or dementia or other diagnosis (and it usually always has to do with their own issues – fear, for example). Treasure your true friends who are sticking with you through this and please know the support, information and education at this site is beyond what I could have imagined when I first joined. Take care.