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Tag Archives: respite

Five Days of Bliss

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We went on our first camping excursion of the season on Saturday, April 18. We always go near our anniversary on April 19, and this was our anniversary/first trip of season combo. Mom goes camping with us, at 92. We have a travel trailer, so it is more like glamping than camping, but in a lovely natural setting on a lake close to home. I keep her in the same routine at the trailer as ...

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Holiday on Ice

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Not quite ice but it sure was bleak, that pre-spring stillness in Ohio while I visited there for two weeks. It was 17 degrees at night, and this spoiled traveler wore a turtleneck, sweatpants, a fleece jacket, a fleece bathrobe and a fleece blanket in an attempt to survive what my family has graciously endured for months. For the first part of the trip I accompanied my husband on a business trip to Baltimore. We ...

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Alice Through the Looking Glass

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Back to full-time caregiving in Florida after my foray into the Land that Spring Forgot, aka Eastern Ohio. I spent two weeks with my husband, running errands and being reminded why I love his voice, his laugh, and his arm around me at night when we go to sleep. When I am in our Ohio house, it feels right, like I have always been there; and when I return to my Florida house, it feels ...

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EXTREME Caregiving: A New Approach

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magA few days ago I was at such a low point. SIL (as shared previously) was falling and we figured out it was attention seeking. I got so hurt and confused. I usually take things in stride, but I’m sorry to say I didn’t this time. The pressures of the situation caught up I guess. I was so sad, so disheartened by that. Just WHY when I do everything I can to help her? SIL ...

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EXTREME Caregiving: Still Trying to Take Care of Me

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Reassessing and setting more clear boundaries really really helped. My Mom rocks! I’d say for any caregiver they must do it, even if they are the only ones caregiving–reassess during any down time they have. Take a day or two and during any free moment make sure you are also taking care of YOU.  Even when my kids were little (I have three, all close in age 24, 23 and 21 now) I still always ...

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Fog

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During caregiving, a fog surrounds you, so much so that you can only see what’s right in front of you. All areas of your life become a blur except for that pressing need that stands an inch from your nose–the care and keep of your caree. That focus can be so helpful as you advocate and decide and implement. Because of that focus, you churn like an efficient machine. You even move mountains. But that ...

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People Who Need People

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People who need people Are the luckiest people in the world If that’s the case, I must find my mother a Kentucky Derby bonnet and head for the nearest racetrack. We’ve been through a lot of changes lately; The Bridge Over Troubled Waters Phase (Introduction to Incontinence 101), the “Sleeping Beauty Phase”, the “Iron Chef Meets Red Bull Phase”. She is bored with me. Albert Einstein’s wisdom of “Insanity: doing the same thing over and ...

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In Celebration Of: The House to Ourselves

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We often talk about getting a break to get out of the house. There’s something to be said about getting a break so you can stay in the house all by yourself. You can eat what you want, lie where you want, watch what you want, roam around in whatever you want to wear. It’s quiet unless you want it to be loud. It’s heaven. So, I wonder: When was the last time you had ...

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Sometimes, It’s Not a Responsibility But an Opportunity

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I had a coaching client a few years ago who did whatever she could to keep the responsibility of caregiving off the shoulders of her husband and her three children. Her mother’s care, she decided, was a burden she must carry alone. Except she couldn’t, especially because the six of them shared a home. Trying to compartmentalize the burden meant she isolated her mom, creating invisible walls she hoped sealed her mom and her declines ...

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Our Mini Respite

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If you have not figured out by now with the many Twitter and Facebook posts, @Trish and I decided to take a few days (three to be exact) and take a mini respite to one of our favorite spots, Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk. Robert is due home Wednesday from the skilled nursing facility (SNF). Our tip combined celebrations–our upcoming 17th anniversary and my birthday. It’s really a “mass mini holiday respite.” We left last Thursday morning just after nine ...

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