Dad_MountainviewBringing shorts and short-sleeve shirts and t-shirts to Dad’s house was a waste of luggage space. Although it’s been raining and chilly, I still managed to get in a few good days of weeding. I also stemmed the growth of Lily of the Valley into the yard. It’s supposed to grow in the other direction…into the woods. It’s not listening.

The cool and damp weather hasn’t stopped Dad and me from doing other things as well. I’ve been through all the Christmas ornaments and decorations in the attic and I’ve put most of them up for sale at my Etsy shop. Dad and I also washed all the curtains in the garage and laundry room and we’re doing a little Spring cleaning there, too. I’ll be taking some garden items home with me. Dad just doesn’t do gardens.

Dad does know how to keep the deer out of the gardens, though. He taught me how to put up a deer fence to keep the critters away from the azaleas and just about everything else the deer munch on in the yard. A few years back, I gave my Mother a big container of “deer away” formula. Dad used it on some of the yard, and I didn’t know it. I kept smelling something that smelled like cow dung, and I mentioned something to Dad about it. He laughed and said it was the deer formula. I didn’t know it smelled so terrible. I guess it works! It would keep me away…

The big news is about our trip to the cemetery on a very cold and windy morning this past week. The funeral home and the public works department finally got it right! Mom’s stone is in the right place, right next to Dad’s sister. In the photo, you can see the bald spot in the ground behind Dad where Mom’s stone was located prior to the move. They had already cemented the stone into the ground, too. We went by the funeral home to thank the director for taking care of everything, and I could see the relief on Dad’s face (as well as on the funeral director’s face!). Dad was so worried that he would die before they got it right.

Dad plans on cremation, too, and he was worried that they would put Mom and him together in the wrong plot. Now it’s up to me to make sure they don’t put Dad’s stone and his cremains in another plot other than the one staked out for Mom (she’s still sitting on the mantel for now) and for Dad.

Please make it easy on me, oh universe. Please. Let’s get this right.

About Linda

Currently I'm writing a memoir about caregiving my mother with a focus on my late husband and how this caregiving affected our marriage. I am also an artist and I have changed my learning lately to more healthful endeavors in an effort to take care of me.


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wonderful post, great picture! thank you for sharing.


Your attention to the details most important to your dad is excellent. It shows your ultimate respect and compassion. I hope you have many more opportunities to plan and hope together, and make memories.


Oh, gosh, I totally understand the pressure and worry about getting it right. !!

What a picture–so much in that one shot. Did you plan to take a photo? Or, did you start snapping what you saw that shot?