Caregiving Blogs

Pop-Up Care and Share: Healing

We met for another first Pop-Up Care and Share last week. During our 20 minutes together, we focused on Healing. We hope you will find our ideas helpful. Before watching, be sure to have paper and pen handy. Learn more and RSVP to join us for a future Pop-Up Care and Share. 0

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The Art of Magical Thinking

You will go out in joy    and be led forth in peace;the mountains and hills    will burst into song before you,and all the trees of the field    will clap their hands. Isaiah 55:12 I am at my desk, editing a dissertation for a client, when Allen slides a piece of white paper to me. Before I turn to my son,…

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Caring, Coping and Hard Decisions

Well, it has been sort of an odd time lately. I have had some great moments these past months with advocacy and with finding a day center for Rod to enjoy a couple days a week. Sounds like that is really positive, right? Well, I have to say I am positively sure this feels weird.…

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Why You Should Tell the Story of the Mountain You Climbed

My husband, Gary, and I climbed several mountains during his cancer years. He was on a treatment to slow down prostate cancer cell growth. One of the side effects was osteoporosis. So in our middle years, we laced up hiking boots and conquered the nearby Oregon Cascades. And then we took on more mountain ranges.…

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And, in Conclusion… ?

It’s been 8 months since Dad died. A lot has happened since then and, though I still feel guilty at times for running away, I’ve realized this really has been the best thing for us and for my relationship with my mom. Having 2000 miles between us seems to have had a positive effect because…

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Watch: Pop-Up Care and Share

We met for our first Pop-Up Care and Share earlier today. During our 20 minutes together, we focused on Success. We hope you will enjoy! Before watching, be sure to have paper and pen handy. The resources I mention in today’s Care and Share include: 14 Caregiving Personalities Webinar: Using Caregiving to Help Your Career…

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The Stories We Tell

Part of me was very much at peace with Dad’s passing. Perhaps going to St. Paul’s gave him the permission he needed to leave. Had Mom been there, he would have desperately wanted to hold on. A few days before, he had told me, “This is a funny thing. Either I’ll get over this or…

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If Only’s

If only we had talked to the Palliative Care Nurse before presenting the whole idea of moving to Mom. If only we had known how short our time was to be with Dad. If only I had been more understanding of Mom’s feelings rather than having my insides knot up and all my old issues…

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Sacred Times

When our sister-in-law’s father died, his family were all in the room with him at home. The hospice nurse was there. Though he was not responding anymore, his wife, children, and grandchildren talked to him and encouraged him on his journey. They sang Broadway show tunes as they had at many family gatherings for years.…

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Wrapping Things Up

Why does it take so long for the roller coaster to stop after our caregiving days are over? I put off making plans with a new friend until the very last second because I didn’t want something to come up and have to cancel. We know how that goes, right? No matter how much we…

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We’re Not Neglecting Our Own, We’re Hyper-Focused on Another’s

On a regular basis, I write about the headlines I read about our caregiving experiences which make me grunt and grimace. I saw another one this week which just makes me cringe: “Caregivers Neglect Their Health.” We’re not neglecting! We are hyper-focused on the health of another because that health is so fragile that life…

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“We Just Have to Help Him”

Last year, I shared with my dad that I was worried about about some memory problems he seems to be having. He and my mom listened, pushed back a bit but agreed to talk about it during my dad’s next doctor’s appointment. That didn’t happen. I try to share my concerns and then allow my…

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Voices from the Edge: Rules for Grieving

“Can I have Dad’s blanket?” my son asks. It is a hot day in July and I cannot imagine why Allen wants a blanket brought from a hospital visit but it has been a draining week and I haven’t the energy to form a question and listen to a response. “Okay,” I say. “I washed…

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Wishing for Worse to Get Better

I’m in an odd space with my parents. They decline but slowly. Their slow declines mean we continue to slowly help more. The slowness sometimes feels unbearable. I find myself wishing they would get worse and fast. When they get worse, I can get better help. I can get them back on palliative care, from…

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