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Caring for Parents

Looking Back – A Lesson on Recharging

While I had her comfortably based in an assisted living facility a few minutes from me, the demands were huge and more often than not, I ended each day – each race – feeling like I had missed the mark and failed to provide the care I know she wanted. 

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Dementia Journal, June 17, 2019

It’s unbearable to think about when she’s gone and my whole reason for being vanishes (or so it seems, since caregiving so totally preoccupies my life). It will all be gone before long, this only life I know.

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Dementia Journal, May 15, 2019 — Emotions of a Caregiver

5 am Deborah Barr wrote a beautiful and wise book for caregivers titled, “Grace for the Unexpected Journey: a 60-day devotional for Alzheimer’s and other dementia caregivers.” I’m only about half-way through the book, but it’s already extensively marked up and tagged. Caregiving is indeed an “unexpected” journey for most of us who embark on…

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Dementia Journal, April 20, 2019

Things are getting harder and harder. I can’t bear to think of it, but I see Mom entering the last stage. I’m thinking more frequently of Hospice, particularly as I believe I’ll soon need a nurse or health professional to come in and check on Mom and advise me how to best ease her various…

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No Better Ending

Mom passed away peacefully, at home, on Tuesday, March 19, 2019 at 3:20 am while I was holding her hand. That was the end of a long, generous, loving life. She was 96 years old and could never understand how she outlived so many in her family. I am sure it was because she had…

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A God Hard Cry – I Sure Needed It

It had been brewing ever since my father-in-law’s heart attack on that Thanksgiving Day. The day started off well with the sound of laughter resulting from the retelling of favorite family stories and the scent of chocolate macadamia nut coffee and cinnamon toast filling the kitchen. Already the house was filling up with family and…

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Caring for my Ma

Today is my first blog posting. My profile profile pic is my mom and her great-grand children. Since my dad past away four years ago, I took on total responsibility of my ma: her financial, health and wellbeing and I had no clue where to begin. My first decision was to move her, my disabled…

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Dementia Journal — March 3, 2019

This has been a week of extremes with Mom. Most days she is sleeping all day and only waking in the latter part of the evening. And this can be a truly deep sleep wherein it’s increasingly difficult to get her to eat or drink anything. I’ve resorted to gently squeezing her under the throat…

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Dementia Journal – February 9, 2019

It’s a quiet Saturday night in early February and I’m sitting here on the sofa with Mom listening to some relaxing music and my new, lighted Zen waterfall. It’s very peaceful. The home aide left at 5:30, so it’s been a rather long evening. I can’t go upstairs to read, and I can’t jump in…

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Toenail Care and Maintenance

I was doing research on removing toenails and found that they do grow back so what is the point? That is what the podiatrist is offering for mom for her ingrown toenails, with a two-week recovery afterwards, I learned in my research.   Then I spent a long time watching YouTube videos by the Meticulous Manicurist on…

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Can you say ‘bah humbug’ for New Year’s Day?

I knew the holidays would be tough. I knew 99% of the people I know would not get it. I did not anticipate being completely alone. A couple of texts but I had to start it. A phone call. Other than that silence. No family here. No longer hear from my late husband’s family. Stopped…

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