Tonight I read something that Denise posted. She was talking about caregivers and how some people believe caregivers should self-identify so people would know they were in that situation. Denise wrote much more but there was a phrase near the end that caught my attention just now. I may not have it exactly worded but I have it pretty darn close..."Why not assume everyone cares?" As often happens when I read something that makes complete sense and also allows me to care about others wholeheartedly, I held my breath for a moment. I let that sentence roll around in my head for a few moments. What on earth did Denise just suggest? In the face of a callous and paranoid culture, Denise suggested we assume that everyone cares, that everyone in some form or the other is a caregiver. We would not have to self-identify and we could treat each other with the respect and willingness to help that we do here in this chat. Well, this made me happy and then it made me giggle and then it hit me what a deep and humbling heart this suggestion came from and one more time I was grateful for Denise and her passion for caregivers. Her statement goes far beyond caregiving in the sense we apply it to ourselves.

What if I assume everyone cares? What if I treat people as if they care? Dynamic and doable. I found myself relaxing. This new perspective takes the monkey off my back. I do not have to try to figure out anything. I act as if it is already done. I can be kind and respond to everyone around me as if they are caregivers. The truth is that most people are in one form or the other. What if I offer to help them as if they need the help rather than waiting to see if they need the help?

In my own life that came to me this week but in a different way. I learned that I can let go of my preconceived notions about how things must be and trust that the people in my life and in Robert's life mean well. Trust that they want the best for him and for me and that I don't have to be afraid or judge them. I can decide that they are doing the best they can and, through communication with them, I can trust they hear me and care. Assume they care!! How magnificent!

Thank you, Denise, for the lesson you brought to me tonight. Simple and doable. Yes!