Because I Care


Because I Care

box-312388_640I am not a caregiver for my parents, but it doesn't mean I don't care for them. Most of you know that I am a caregiver to my husband, but lately it seems my parents are slowly falling under my umbrella.

My parents have lived in my home town for about 40 years and in the same house for about 30 years. This year they sold the house. On one hand I'm grateful as it a whole lot of house and yard for Dad to care for, on the other hand I'm sad to see it go. I grew up there and as Dad put it, "it has a lot of memories." It's the first house my parents ever owned. However, with Dom having a knee replacement and another on the way, the stairs aren't her friend and with Dad having had a minor stroke a few years ago and nerve damage in both arms, half an acre of lawn and a house that runs on a well system is getting to be too much.

My brother and I offered to come home and help pack, but they preferred we didn't travel through the Rockies in the winter and they wanted to putter at it over the two months they had to pack. They aren't moving far, but they are going from a town of 1,500 people to a city of 70,000. This is what makes me worry. It also makes my parents drive me bananas. The amount of phone calls between Mom and I in regards to moving companies, moving and rental insurance and my dad's poor attitude at times are too many to count. During this time Dad developed a bad reaction to his cholesterol pills and was suffering with anxiety, depression and some muscle atrophy. It got to the point where Mom would call and just hand him the phone to see if I could talk him through it. The doctor finally took him off the med and has Dad on a specialized diet which he calls the "oatmeal and boiled meat" diet.

Mom has asked me to also research things for them to do because she doesn't know where to start. So I've been spending time trying to find seniors groups, recreational costs and things for dad to do so mom doesn't bury him in the back yard.

This change in their life hasn't just affected them, it's affecting me and I'm tired. Between Mike's cellulitis flare ups and the phone calls from my parents I need a spa day. I may not care FOR my parents, but I do care ABOUT them.

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You deserve a spa day!!\r\n\r\nSounds to me like you're caring about and for your parents. :) Keep us posted as you can.


Oh my. it is so hard to help parents adjust in your situation! You've got great ideas and understanding so I hope things settle down quickly and they adjust well. I am praying that they find new friends! You go have your spa day too!


A spa day sounds like just the thing. At least in a city of 70,000 there should be ample opportunity for recreational activities for your parents.

John Parks-Coleman

It definitely is a unique kind of stress. Please, don't let the stress get to you, you can only handle things as they come; and, because you DO care, it can easily consume you.


I think caring long distance is a unique kind of stress! I hope your parents can adapt soon to these life changes and need less from you.