Can It Get More Depressing?

Teresatalk

Can It Get More Depressing?

Teresatalk
This is perhaps the hardest thing to report to my fellow caregivers. My husband started showing more and more symptoms (mostly due to C.O.P.D. oxygen deprivation, they thought) ever since he came back from a two-night home visit over Christmas. Then, much too suddenly, but then again perhaps at just the right time for him, he breathed his last at the care center on February 2nd, where he had been forced to reside for the last 14 months. I say "forced" because he referred to it as "jail", even though he had adjusted quite well and admitted it was a pretty nice place, if he had to be somewhere. It just wasn't home.

I then poured myself into preparing for his memorial service three weeks later. It was the last thing I could do for him, and it was so comforting for me and our daughter to hear all the nice things people said about him. Even though it was an icy, "snow day" for this Nebraska town, with several churches even closing their doors that morning, we still had a full church come out to celebrate and remember his life.

I honestly don't know if I'll be able to contribute anything to the caregiving community any more, but then a part of me remembers that the changes that caregiving brought to my heart will always be there. I'm not sure how long this time of grieving will last, or what form it will take, but I do know the One who has brought me through everything will not go away. I've still got Him on speed-dial (aka prayer).