Exhaustion (a.k.a. Compassion Fatigue )

Il

Exhaustion (a.k.a. Compassion Fatigue )

Il
Sunsets and Car Crashes Sunsets and Car Crashes (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


This is dedicated to @rainbow, who I hope will write more about compassion fatigue.

Caregiving is "sometimes too much of a challenge" to the point that my feelings are buried and "I’m so tired and when I think of all the tasks I have besides (my parents') care, I feel like I have no more strength to go on. But I have to... dealing with trauma and also having to care-give simultaneously. The trauma is enough."

Now I have the guts to say I'm dealing with PTSD and depression and I've chosen to be a caregiver to Mom and Dad. Compound stressors have caused my body to be in survival mode for so long that it doesn't remember how release emotions. I see Mom's decline every day and hear things like Mom saying. "It wasn't me" who wet the bed or Dad doesn't remember what he said. I'm cooking dinner in the middle of sundowning.

It's exhausting. My body collapsed about an hour ago and then once again there was a need for compassion so I came here. I think part of the reason for not crying is that I'm in an environment where I don't have the human touch of someone's shoulders to cry on.

So I feel alone. But I must go on because the choice of not going on is not an option for me.

I've been wanting to use this picture of "Sunsets and Car Crashes" because that's exactly what I feel like I'm in: a Car Crash in the middle of a Sunset.

Always, il

Like this article? Share on social

7 Comments

Sign in to comment

Il

Welcome Bob I hope you and I and everyone can stay well in the midst of all this stress! Got the hugs! Sending more to you . . il

Bob

Thanks il. I have some ideas for the Compassion fatigue blog and also ideas for blogs for other current experiences. One has to do with what do you do when your own health becomes at risk. Right now am in the middle of getting my wife settled in the new facility she is in. Hope to get a chance to blog soon. (((hugs)) back at you.........

Il

Bob, bless your heart. I still give you credit for the title and if / when you're ready I hope you share your experiences . . you already did here. I'll look into that webinar as well. You have so much going on as well. . . . Thank you for being there you. I can also relate to not being able to deal with things like 30 day notices and what sounds like wanting security? Just a thought . . hoping for good days for you too!\r\n\r\n((((hugs )))))\r\nil

Bob

You deserve the credit il. You related your experience of compassion fatigue or exhaustion and how you uniquely experience it. Right now I'm going through a difficult time. My wife is being transferred to another nursing facility. I feel pretty overwhelmed and exhausted. My body was shaking with anxiety today and stomach was doing flip flops from the stress. Today I went to visit the facility and went on a tour and asked questions. I believe this facility might be better in a lot of ways than the one she was at. She doesn't want to leave the current one but there has been an on-going butting of heads between her and the staff. With that being said, I felt it was a matter of time before this outcome was going to occur. It has happened with other facilities she has been in. She is very angry, scared, and miserable understandably about being in a long term care facility. I can certainly relate. She is going to be 63 next week. There are more losses involved. I have to be honest and say she hasn't taken responsibility for the part she has played in having been given a thirty day notice that they \"could no longer meet her needs.\" It may sound cruel, but it's true. I'm pretty exhausted with the on-going challenges and constant litany of complaints---some very valid, some I feel based on unrealistic expectations. I know because it happens with me. This reply describes some of my compassion fatigue for now. As soon as I can rub some more words together, I'll write that blog on Compassion Fatigue from my own perspective and from what I have read about \"Care-giver Burnout\", which I've seen as a synonym for Compassion Fatigue in care-giving circles. I started listening to Denise's webinar on \"How to get out of a Funk\" but haven't finished yet. Being in a funk has been a very common experience for me and I do need to learn how to deal with it. I recommend that webinar. Not sure if I have the title exactly right. Blessings, Bob

Il

Thank you Maria . . . Bless your heart. Yes it is emotional and I wonder how many caregivers are acknowledged caregivers? Always, il

See more comments