Falling Behind...

There are times when I get into this funky mood and just can't get myself to snap out of it. Well right now I am currently in it.

Lately I just been noticing more and more that people from high school are moving on with life and doing great things while I'm stuck in mine. Many girls who went to school with me have children, married and some are even on their second child. No I do not want to be 23 and having kids, but it would be nice to know that I had that choice or option. I want to be able to have a boyfriend, but how am I suppose to do that when I don't have the time to go out and meet people.

When I do have time I just want to be home sleeping or hanging out with people I already know. My last relationship didn't work because the person I was with didn't understand that my priority was taking care of my mom, well yes that was his loss. At the same time I envy him because he was able to walk away from this, but I'm stuck and don't have an option to walk away.

I am one to love all this new social networks, but right now I'm really disliking them. I hate going on and seeing all the new exciting things people are doing. I just want to be able to check out. I want to be able to turn off my cell for the day without worrying about getting calls from my siblings or parents. I just want to be able to pick up and go wherever I want to without looking back at anything. Well I know this is all a dream...

I just needed to vent. I might not make any sense but I know this is the only place where I will not be judged.

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