Four Months


Four Months

road-791160_640I can't believe it will be 4 months on August 2nd since Myron's death. Sometimes it seems like only yesterday, other times it seems much longer because he was in the nursing home for a time. I can't get use to the loneliness and emptiness of the house.

I have joined the local Jewish Community and go for water aerobics and senior yoga.  It forces me along with meeting friends for lunch to get moving most days.  There were too  many days I didn't want to leave the house or get dressed  so I forced  myself to commit to doing things.

Still have some days when I don't want to get dressed or leave the house but much fewer.  Also, the various Grief Groups I attend help.  I keep telling myself that I can get through this but the loss sometimes seem so overwhelming and I have too much time to think.  I have a lot of things I should be doing, but I don't have the energy to do them.

I am very thankful that I have good friends who push me to get out of the house and meet with them. I pray every day for the strength to travel down this lonely road.




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A few days ago I reached the one year mark of my moms death. My life had become more of a servant concerning the constant care she was needing. I did all those things for her because I wanted to and she deserved it, she was such a great person. I still have a few days where I just stay home and watch tv, play on the computer, or work on art projects at home and don't get dressed. But luckily those are fewer and farther apart than they used to be. Similar to what joining the Jewish Community has done for you about 3 months after my mom passed I began taking ceramics classes from a teacher I have known for 19 years in order to have something planned that would get me out of the house and interacting with people and making new friends. Its not that I think of my mom any less often, it is just easier now to remind myself that she would want me to be getting out and living and doing things she felt guilty about making me unable to do before.


Thank you for sharing with us at this unsettling time. You have friends here, support, and solid companions on your journey, today.


Hi Dar,\nIt sounds like you are facing your grief head on and allowing yourself to go \"through\" it. I'm glad you've found support groups and have friends that \"push\" you out of the house.\n\nThe first thing I thought of reading your blog was a comment another member made to me about grieving and the time perception. She called it \"a long time ago yesterday\". I thought yes, that is how it is at times.