Keeping Up the Status Quo

EllysGdaughter
image

Our spring has been pretty short this season. We have already had very hot weather and that means those spring chores become uncomfortably hot chores! Elly's back patio has been closed in for many years but really needs some updating. Last spring, we enclosed the long side with window screening and then wrapped it in plastic for the winter to keep out the elements. She is very resistant to change and tends to have strong ideas about how "things are just fine the way they are." In this instance, we removed all the foil that had been stapled below the shelf which was tearing off, flapping in the breeze. There was a 50-year-old redwood picnic table that we removed and added the plastic shelf unit. Elly can now reach her pots without the rickety table. We will be removing the lattice on this end portion and putting up screening on the inside with a sunscreen cloth on the outside to keep the afternoon sun from beating in. She still wants the foil. Well, she is giving her approval to the first phase here in this picture. The only thing missing is Sophie, the cat who eventually showed up and gave her approval also!

Elly usually talks like she will be around for quite a while longer, she wants to make sure we know she will need the bedroom nightstands and dresser back when we are done with them. I don't challenge that she isn't going to need those when she graduates to Heaven. Recently, we talked about the electrical pole that is in the middle of her back 1/4 acre which has two guy wires securing it. These are really annoying when we play Bocce or throw the ball for a visiting dog. She seemed unconcerned that her son was very upset with the placement of this new pole (last summer) due to the possible devaluing of the property. Elly mentioned during our recent conversation that the pole/wires didn't really bother her since the next owner will have to deal with it. Sometimes I am not sure how much she is accepting or processing!

Some of the other kinds of talk I am exposed to tells me that she just struggles with the inability to take care of her place. She will tell us or others, "Well, I didn't water MY back lawn last year at all, I am just letting it go black." "Don't bother watering the flower beds, there's nothing out there anyway." My sister and I have been caring for her property for the past 10 years. Of course, we just continue on taking care of all the roses, bulbs, perennials, annuals, whateveralls. We've installed drip irrigation onto all the major flower beds. We started capturing shower water in buckets to pour out on the pots and driveway flower bed. Elly is upset that we keep buckets in the bathroom and expressed that we are NOT to keep buckets of water in the bathroom!!! She is worried about flooding the hardwood floors because it happened one time when the plumber didn't connect a pipe properly. We will try keeping them in the tub hidden behind the shower curtain, especially when we are away from home. Now we know she snoops in our bathroom, LOL! I am grateful for last week's admission that she can't sweep or mop anymore because she isn't steady on her feet. Now, when I do those chores in her sight, I won't have to listen to the "you don't need to do that" comments. I was getting tired of staying up late to do floors!!

Here's hoping your Spring is putting a "spring" in your caregiving step today!

Join our mailing list

Sign up to receive our monthly newsletter that includes caregiving tips, news, support and more.