My Mom's Memory


My Mom's Memory

fog-510670_640For the past six months or so, my dad has been asking me if I notice a problem with my mom's memory. "She's really getting vague," he said.

I've paid attention. My mom keeps track of my dad's health, asks good questions during his doctor's appointment, keeps up with all the new information we receive about my dad's changing health. She manages her very social calendar, remembers important dates in the grandchildren's lives and shows up on time for all her appointments.

But, in the past week, two odd situations happened.

Last week, she called me for help as she changed my dad's ostomy bag. "How do I do this?" she asked, showing me a wax donut stuck on top of the ostomy bag. The wax donut, which seals the bag to the skin, adheres to a circle of tape which surround the bag's opening. She put the donut on the bag rather then adhering the donut to the bag's sticky tape by removing the sticker which covers the tape. She had reversed the process. "You remove the sticker and then put the donut on the tape," I explained. "I got really confused," she said, "I just couldn't remember how to do this." "It's okay," I assured her.

Last night, before I left for my walk, I walked down to the house's lower level (the family room) to tell my parents I was going for a walk so they wouldn't lock me out. My dad was in the bathroom so I told my mom I was heading out for a walk. "Okay," she replied. When I got home from my walk, I was locked out.

After my parents let me in, my mom said she didn't know I was out so had locked the door. I explained that I told her before I left and that she had acknowledged that she heard me. She has no recollection of that happening.

I emailed my siblings this morning to keep them posted.

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I'm really sorry, Denise. I know that worry only too well.


I feel so sorry for your mom. It doesn't sound like forgetting frustrates her and she is able to admit it. She may have a lot on her mind and with everything it's taking it's toll. Elly seems to have worse moment when she doesn't take her vitamin D or is depressed. Sometimes I can't figure out why we are having the bad spells but I just offer her comfort and keep extra keys with me even to go out to the mailbox. . . been there, done that!


Do you see this as a sudden onset, or something that has been ramping up awhile? I imagine each scenario could mean different things, and I'm just curious about that.


All the other comments_mysql pretty much sum up anything I could say. I've marveled at how well your parents have been able to continue functioning as such high levels. It seems from what I read that it seems like a rather sudden onset, so let's hope it can be attributed to stress.


Denise,\r\n I'm SO sorry to hear about your mom. With all that you have been through with your dad and then you have this with your mom, Do you think that some of this could be for the stress of what your dad has been going through? My prayers are with your family !\r\nHugs!\r\nmaria

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