No Filter

Denine

No Filter

Denine
mother mother_arnellcalderon "Can we value stillness as much as we value movement?" – Arnell Calderon

I read this quote from a teenage photographer whose work was featured in a Harlem museum exhibit I saw on Sunday. Here’s what I see in his photograph, whether it’s there or not:

The room of a sick person...Bill stacking up...Medicine...A caregiver...Distracted boredom...A son behind the camera, choosing to appreciate the moment

Today is a frustrating day. I want to fix Grandma’s pain, keep her from sleeping so much, get her to eat more.

I want to be smart enough to figure out:

-which advice is right

-which medicine is best

-which tone of voice I should take

-which food I should give her

-how worried I should be

A nurse called me today. She helped me navigate all of the above questions. She sometimes said, “I just don’t know.” I appreciated that. She said, “You are not in control of her. You can’t fix everything.”

Sometimes I believe the opposite.

A quote from Charles Spurgeon:

What, if for a while thou art called to stand still, yet this is but to renew thy strength for some greater advance in due time. Precipitancy cries, “do something. Stir yourself; to stand still and wait, is sheer idleness.” We must be doing something at once--we must do it so we think--instead of looking to the Lord, who will not only do something but will do everything.”

I think that Arnell’s already got it figured out. Can I value stillness today rather than movement (i.e. my phone calls, my solutions, my routine)? Can I wait for the salvation of the Lord in the context of my grandmother’s care, even if that means:

-another day of pain

-another day of helplessness

-another day of trusting

We’ll find out.

Like this article? Share on social

2 Comments

Sign in to comment

Denine

Update: I WAS still and did indeed wait for \"the salvation of the Lord.\" And thing with Gma's pain have been working itself out. I decreased her meds, and so far there's been no difference in her pain, yet she's more alert and pleasant. \r\n\r\nLess turned out to be more. Go figure!

EllysGdaughter

Thanks for sharing Denine! Being still is just as hard as being a doer! Be Still and KNOW that I am God is what I have to continue to remember when I just get frustrated. Some times I can do it and other times I slip into the doing or the engaging when I should just be still! I screw up but I know that God grants me so much more grace and mercy for me that I do myself. Thanks for the reminder today. God is the ultimate \"fixer\" and healer for us and our Grandmas! (((((((((HUGS)))))))))))