Ribs, Roses and Respite


Ribs, Roses and Respite

when they visit or they want me or my husband to order out.

This year I told them to visit mom on the  Saturday before Mother's day because I wanted to have a day where I could enjoy my own kids and not do things for everyone including them. I told them my hubby was not barbecuing and I was not baking a ham after church on Sunday.

By late Saturday afternoon no one had shown up so we figured they weren't coming. We went to a new take-out Texas smokehouse style BBQ that had just opened in the neighborhood. I brought some back for mom and we were ready to eat and then the phone rings. "Hello, we had to take a detour and we got lost coming to see Mom." In my head I thought, if you people would visit more often you wouldn't get lost.

A look of panic was on my husband's face. We were thinking the same thing; these are the same relatives that bring Tupperware and foil to family functions and take home most, if not all, of our leftovers. This year, I started pretending to accidentally let my large dog Rusty in the kitchen near the end of the events. They don't venture into the kitchen anymore.

While I was still talking to my sister on the phone, my husband was stacking our plates and the slab of ribs and running up the stairs. He had one of my large gift bags and had put everything in there. He hid our take-out meal in the gift bag on top of our dresser. The door bell rang and he said, "Phew that was close."

I couldn't see them at the door. All I saw were the  bouquets of roses they bring me and Mom every year and my little niece peeping out from behind them. "Oh Aunt Angie, Nana got lost. I am so tired. Did you cook?" She's only 7 and very petite but eats a lot. "No, no, I didn't cook." I felt bad because we had just hid the ribs but I wasn't giving in. I knew her nana, my sister, would enlist my son to drive them to KFC or and that is what happened.

My son was annoyed because this happens every time I don't cook for them. "Why don't they ever bring us something? You take care of grandma all year." I love my son he always has my back and he puts up with all of the shenanigans around here.

Mom, who ordinarily doesn't remember anything due to her dementia, says, "I could have sworn there was some potato salad and ribs here just a second ago." I felt bad that I  didn't say anything. It was for the greater good because she would actually have something to eat once they left.

My son came back with the KFC for my sister which we won't eat because we stopped eating fried food for health reasons. There was some grilled chicken mixed in so Mom ate with them. I was starving and was hoping they would leave so I could eat my ribs.

Mom enjoyed seeing her great grandkids. I love them too but I won't be watching my niece this summer. Remember her  lobster incident at the buffet in my other post? That's why.

They didn't stay long; my sister doesn't like driving at night and her grand kids were very active and driving her nuts. Their mom was at work and a baby and a 7-year-old can tire one out very quickly.

On Sunday, my husband and son took me to Capitola Beach and my daughter watched Mom for me and took me out for sushi. I finally graduated from my multimedia design courses and my sister's gift was to pay for my tuition. It wasn't such a bad weekend and we ended up with left overs this time.

On Memorial Day, I am not having family over for once. Large crowds sometimes upset Mom. The main reason is she looks sad and tells each person she hasn't had any dessert and ends up tricking at least five people into giving her more cake.

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Ooohhh, Angie, I'm so glad you hid the ribs!! \r\n\r\nI love how you set new boundaries around your special day. You don't have to take care of others on these holidays. I completely agree with your son--family needs to bring you dinner. \r\n\r\nLooking forward to this afternoon's video chat. :)