Righting My Ship


Righting My Ship

sunset-675847_640Yesterday, I did what helps make me feel better:

I blogged.

I rested throughout the day.

I went to bed early. (Last week, I discovered that "NYPD Blue" airs at 10 p.m. I LOVE that show. I stayed up until 11 p.m. watching those 10-year-old reruns. Last night, I put myself to bed at 9 p.m., reminding myself that Andy Sipowicz does not need my help.)

It worked because today I felt much better.

I had a good day with my folks. My dad happily reported that my mom ate better at lunch today. We changed my dad's ostomy bag just as it started to leak which meant we avoided an accident. I wrapped his leg, only having to re-do a few layers twice. This wrapping requires just the right amount of loose tension.

Sibling will stop by for her monthly visit with my parents tonight. I came up with a retort they can use with her if she gives them a hard time about anything (like not being updated about my mom's UTI or stomach flu or whatever). I suggested they tell her, "We're respecting your request to remain uninvolved." They both liked it so I feel good they won't feel flat-footed or tongue-tied if she stirs the pot. I also reminded them that she loves drama and the best way to diffuse her drama is by simply ignoring it.

After my visit, I stopped at Trader Joe's to buy pretzel rolls and sandwich fixings for my meeting tomorrow with siblings. I've got my agenda and requests ready.

I understand I have more rough waters ahead. That's okay. I can navigate them. My parents are dying. Maybe not tomorrow or next week. Maybe we'll enjoy another year or two together. Maybe not. I understand where we're headed.

Today, I felt the ship straighten out.

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Denise, I hope the meeting went well.

Anthony Zullo

Wow Denise this was great,glad things are somewhat settling for you and I hope it continues. You're a great caregiver.


What a gift to yourself to know what rights your ship and having the insight to know it needed righting! I hope your meeting goes smoothly and is effective in getting your parent's needs met.


You are a true lighthouse for all of us, Denise. Thank you for continuing to be here for us AND for sharing your own caregiving journey struggles and successes!\r\n\r\nAnd what channel is NYPD BLUES on?


I'm glad your parents are better, 'cause when they feel better, so do you. Hope your family meeting went well, was productive, and your parents feel more in control with a good response to your sibling's involvement.\r\nLike the captain of the ship with the compass and map, you are ready for the waters, no matter what they are like.\r\nWatch out for Trader Joe's, tho; we bought 7 bottles of their Triple Brew Ginger Beer and I spent $$$$ mailing it to Ohio, only to see it got recalled for bottles exploding! Yikes!

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