Scary Day Leads to I-Want-to-Scream Night


Scary Day Leads to I-Want-to-Scream Night

After a good weekend it all went to hell.

I came home and Mom was on the front porch, God only knows how long she'd been out there. She went to get the mail and could not get up the one step back into the house from the porch. Even with my help she could barely do it. She remained freaked out for over two hours. I did get her to eat a little bit of dinner and gave her a glass of wine. It helped.

But when I asked a friend to come by tomorrow to help her get from the house to her ride to Optimists and then back into the house she flipped out again - and is now refusing to go. This weekly meeting means EVERYthing to her. For her to refuse to go is huge. Just huge.

Now, today I had to call the ride program to change the location of the meeting as tomorrow is a special meeting. Now I have to call back tomorrow and cancel the ride.

My aunt in Connecticut has a ramp on loan from the caregiver agency she uses as my uncle can't navigate stairs any longer. I don't know of any agencies here that do that, so more phone calls. There is no way into or out of this house that does not involve stairs. Oh, and she won't use the railings.

So after dinner she gets up to go to the bathroom. I see her walk across the hall to her room - bare booty for all to see - carrying her undies. Good reason. FULL of poop. Jeans full of poop. I was able to get her into a very warm shower and wash her off.... LOTS of poop. The house stinks. The chair in the living room stinks.

So had to throw out the underpants.

Am doing laundry. Lots and lots of laundry. Use Dreft on her clothes and will still have to wash many things twice. Apparently we've been having poop issues all week. Only one pair of underwear is not poopy.

I hate poop.

Interesting thing is how calm I am during these kinds of situations and how explosive I get with the little crap. You'd think it would be the other way around, but no. I can turn off everything when faced with a crisis but give me everyday whiney-ass stupid crap and I go off.


So she had an awful day and now all I want to do is scream.

Me. Right Now.

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I need to measure the stairs up to the porch and see what I can get away with ramp-wise for size. The sidewalk is off-center to the door which opens out. Found one by Titan - metal with railings for less than $500 on Amazon and a good $75 less direct from the company itself which was interesting. But it's $$ I don't have. :-( :sad:


Lawd a'mercy! I relate. Especially to the big issues as opposed to the minor issues. I can clean poop, wash three loads of soiled laundry, life my husband up and down all day and then one sentence or one request can have me seething and muttering under my breath. I feel for you. I really feel for you. At his moment...knock on wood...I don't deal with behavioral issues. I think that is a blessing because I don't do well with behavioral stuff. \r\nI don't know if they are in your area but there are Baptist men's groups who put in ramps for people for free. It is part of what they do on a daily basis. They help repair rundown homes, go to disaster sites, etc. A friend of mine asked a group to do our ramp and it is beautiful. I suspect there are resources within other civic groups that do that sort of thing also. My hat is off to you, Cat! Much love!


Your posts remind me so much of what I was dealing with before my parents went into assisted living. My heart goes out to you, I understand your anger - how you manage to deal with the big things and explode over smaller things. I did the same over and over. I won't tell you it gets better because I don't know how it will go for you. For me, things got better once they were in assisted living. We were lucky. My parents qualified for Medicaid.