Something New

Casandra Porter

Something New

Casandra Porter
blockie-checklist-mdMany things have finally started to come together after months of trying to get them organized. We finally have Marc's COBRA coverage setup and a new ID card on the way, since he lost his original.

We have a scheduled blood test and MRI, as well.

I am also in the process of getting him setup with a new primary care physician since he has an ENT and neurologist. I like the idea of having someone more centralized and involved with his care that knows what's going on with all fronts and can be a back-up for refills, tests, etc.

In researching him a primary MD at Stanford I ran across a few whose profiles stated they focused on palliative care. Having no idea what this was, I did a little further research and discovered, hey, this is just what I am looking for. Kind of like, a one-stop shop of medical care. You can find out more here: http://www.getpalliativecare.org/whatis/

Once I learned what it was (and strongly feel this should happen at any medical office, regardless) I decided to look over our concerns and make a more definitive list of things we wanted checked when we make this appointment.

In making his list, I started making one of my own. I don't have insurance, as I opted out of my own to make it more affordable to keep his and take care of his medicines, etc. But I have concerns.

Yet, as I wrote my list, I had to ask myself. How many of these things are a real concern for me and how many are manifested because I am looking for something?

I am not usually one to romanticize illnesses. I've had a couple of occasions when I walked around with pneumonia while reaffirming to myself and others that it was "just a cold." But somewhere between not sweating the small stuff of my own and battling with Marc's larger more life-threatening issues, I can't help but feel looking at this list that I may be turning into a bit of a hypochondriac.

I hope this is not the case. I hope that with all the added stress lately and the downtime, I'm just going through a phase and it will all pass.

What a horrible feeling to think you have a problem and no way to solve it. And I think because I recently just dealt with this entire fiasco of getting Marc's insurance straightened out and all the scenarios of "what ifs" that were running through my head for him that I am now doing the same thing with myself. I am assuming this is all a product of my current anxiety issue. Hopefully soon this will all pass and I can go back to being my "somewhat" carefree self.

Like this article? Share on social