Surviving

Teresatalk

Surviving

Teresatalk
I feel like a traitor sometimes. I tell my husband I'm on his side for his being able to leave the skilled nursing center, where he's been for the last nine months. But to myself I think, who am I kidding? There's no way I can care for him at home now, like I did for the last sixteen years since his accident.

From time to time, I gently tell him this, but to no avail. He still has waves of fear and discouragement that he will not be coming home... maybe ever. At 71 years of age, with more than one chronic, life-threatening health condition plaguing him, he is probably right. But neither of us can say this out loud.

I get sad about it as well. It's a whole new chapter of our life, and quite possibly will be the hardest for both of us to experience. Even though I don't have the same physical tasks of caregiving and a lot of the stress is gone, I am still very much a part of his life. Fortunately, I can still take him to church. He can have outings, as his mobility is still pretty good.

The main difference is, when he was living at home, he seemed to be happy. But now that he's where he is, he's just surviving.

But there's a lot to be said for surviving. Time has shown, we do it best together.