Tell Us: What's One of Your Caregiving Blunders?


Tell Us: What's One of Your Caregiving Blunders?

I decided yesterday that one of the day's biggest challenges is getting past my blunders.

Oh, the blunders!shield-98378_640 They interrupt my sleep, darken my sunny days, let doubt creep in where hope once reigned.

I do a much better job coping with blunders, i.e., letting them go, when I connect with others who make blunders, too. I feel so much better when I'm in good company. When I know it's not just me,  I can forgive myself, put the mishap in my past, keep going.

We all make blunders; we just mistakenly believe we are the only ones.

Today, tell us about one of your caregiving blunders. It could be a blunder from way back, from a minute ago, from last week. And, if you want, please feel free to share how you worked through the blunder.

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Hands down, this one:\r\n\r\nOur routine was give my caree her suppository, set a timer to wait 45 minutes. (Timer came into play when forgot in past). Then put her on bedside commode, set her walker in front of her to hold on to, then I sat next to her. At this point she could still sit but would start sliding down when she got tired. One day I forgot an item I needed and went to the bathroom to grab it while I left her sitting on the commode. The bathroom was next door. Once in the bathroom, I got distracted and totally forgot what I was doing. Instead I started tidying up. It wasn't until P asked how we were doing that I was brought back to the task at hand. I rushed back to her room.\r\n\r\nI found her on the floor. She had slide down and off, was still holding on to the walker that was laying on top of her. She was laid out on her back, with her head under the bucket of the commode. When P and I got to her, she didn't appear to be in pain. (She hadn't been able to speak in years and by then rarely responded to any verbal questions.) We checked out her limbs one at time, then tried to figure out how to get her off the floor. When we rolled her to put on draw sheet, I could see she was bleeding profusely. The frail, thin skin over her tailbone had sheered off. \r\n\r\nI can't even begin to describe how horrible I felt.\r\n\r\nP and I sat on either side of her on the floor, trying to figure out if we should call an ambulance. I was crying and his eyes were welling up. That is when P's mom put one hand on my shoulder, the other on Ps, then looked into my eyes, then his and smiled so gently as if to say, \"it's OK\". She rarely connected on any level in those days because of her advanced dementia. The wound eventually healed, but it would be an issue an ongoing issue.\r\n\r\nThat moment, that she looked into my eyes, is what helps me forgive myself. I know I gave caregiving my all, and I have to remind myself that I'm human. I worry about my own memory and concentration, and hope that my issues are stress connected and not Alzheimer's like my mother and grandmother before me.