Tell Us: When Do You Hate to Ask for Help?


Tell Us: When Do You Hate to Ask for Help?

life-belt-498453_640I regularly ask for help. I'm good about asking my siblings to take my parents to a doctor's appointment if I can't. I'm good about stopping to ask for directions when I'm lost. I'm good about asking for help from volunteers in our community.

But, I still face situations when I know I have to ask for help and I just hate it. For instance, I hate when I have to ask someone to help by stepping in to fill my place--like co-hosting #eldercarechat, a Twitter chat which happens twice a month that I co-founded in 2010. Lately, I haven't been able to attend this chat, which I love. I have a sub for today's chat but I so worry about how often I can't attend either because of a work or caregiving commitment. I hate to ask for help because I think if I ask for help too much then the opportunity to co-host will disappear. In essence, asking for help seems to look like I can't keep my commitment.

What about for you? When do you hate to ask for help? Tell us about it in our comments section, below.

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I am not good at all... If family were nearby, that would be easier to ask them, but I still have problems asking family too.

Lillie Fuller

When do I hate asking for help? ALWAYS! I hate when I have to ask my son for money because Mom and I are broke. I hate when I have to ask Ruth to come over and stay with my mom. I hate when I have to ask my youngest son to come over and help me do something, move something, start the lawnmower. I even hate when I have something I need to do and I have to ask for help with the afternoon chat that I moderate.


A corollary to not asking for help, is for me, the circular thinking of, \"I can't.....\" I can't got to an Alzheimer meeting. I can't see a counselor. I can't send my mother to day care. Maybe if I asked for help for these things, I could do them. But the \"I can't\" thinking goes hand-in-hand with the no-help thinking, so I have dismissed anything that might help me before anyone has even had the chance to refuse my request.


My sister in law is coming over tomorrow to do laundry and some cleaning while I am at work. I know it's irrational, but I feel like she's going to think I'm a bad housekeeper.