The Difference Between Whining and Venting

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The Difference Between Whining and Venting

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alone-261840_640Is there a difference? Sometimes I don't think there is. I don't want people to think that I'm just a whiner and complainer, but sometimes I need to vent. I only have one person in my life that could probably understand how I feel, and even though I've tried really hard to form a relationship with her, she doesn't seem interested. I try not to take that personally. That's difficult because I take pretty much everything personally. But that's my problem, not hers.

Anyway, I think part of why I'm having such a hard time lately is because I have nowhere to vent my feelings. And there are a lot of them. Frustration...Resentment...Fear...Anger...Hostility...Sadness...Loneliness, all wrapped up in a big ball of Guilt. How do I overcome all these emotions? How do I learn to have compassion, patience, love, forgiveness, fulfillment more than the negative emotions? I spend so much of my time feeling sorry for myself because of the future I have to give up. When did I become so selfish? When did the disconnect happen where I went from worrying about my husband and wanting to do everything in my power to help him, to resenting him and not wanting to deal with it anymore? I think the worst emotion is guilt. I hate feeling bad for the way I feel. But I also feel like I should want to take care of my husband all the time since I love him so much.

Someone asked me what I'm looking for here. I don't totally know the answer to that. Support obviously, but also friendship, validation of my feelings, understanding from people who are going through the same thing as me. I don't know what the right word would be, but no longer feeling so alone.

In case you can't tell,this is my first blog post, ever. I hope I did it right, lol. Please bear with me as I try to get my head on straight. I'm not sure what I'm talking about most of the time, so I'm sorry if I'm rambling or don't make sense. I have a lot more to say, but I'll save it for another time. Thanks for reading :)

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jacquie

OMG Meghan. I thought for a moment I was the author of your blog!!!! That's exactly how I feel. You hit the nail on the head!!! No, you are not selfish. I feel the exact same way!!! To use most of your words...When did the disconnect happen where I went from worrying about my Dad and wanting to do everything in my power to help him, to resenting him and not wanting to deal with it anymore? But without going in depth, I'm assuming your husband is ill, where my Dad is just lazy. He knows what he's doing!!! I'm going to say that's why this website was created...so we can free our hearts & minds of the bad feelings for a while, & really know there are others who feel just like us!!!! A shoulder to cry on without the actual physical shoulder.

Meghan

Thank you for your comments_mysql Margaret. I have been getting this speech a lot lately, but thank you for reiterating it. I'm trying to take more time for myself. I have decided to devote 1 Friday evening a month to myself and do whatever I want. It's not much, but it's a start.

Meghan

Thank you so much Gloria. I have heard that quote before. It is so true. I'm doing a lot better now. Another quote that I like is \"God gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers\". I try to think of it that God trusted me enough to take care of this. I try to feel honored. That's tough sometimes, but I know I can handle it with God's help. God bless you too Gloria.

Meghan

I'm sorry for your struggles Edward. It's really hard to feel like you're missing out on everything. Try to find some time for yourself. Even if its 10 min. It will help a lot. Maybe sit outside and listen to music or read a book once your mom is in bed? I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Meghan

I'm sorry for what you're going through Rose. It's so difficult taking care of someone else. And it definitely puts a strain on the relationship. I don't really have any advice, but I will say a prayer for you.

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